(Closed) Should I be worried?

posted 4 years ago in TTC
Post # 3
6 posts
  • Wedding: October 2008

@monet11:  I wish I had some great advice for you but I am sorry I don’t.  What I can say is I know the feeling.  I feeling starting to chart is a big leep for us. and little more control freekish thank I really want to get about the whole thing, but at the same time I feel like I should be doing more if this is something we really want.  I just remind myself that when it is time it will happen… and in the mean time I just keep loving my life and looking for peace.  I hope you find peace in the in between times.  

Post # 4
1180 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2016

I cant say I know a ton about TTC. But since I got pregnant NTNP I have been really finding information on pregnancy and stuff and have been reading a lot on the WB from the charters and such. I consider myself NTNP because we were not using any kind of BC… we just thought the chances were so slim of getting pregnant that we kind of were in denial we would get preg. I got off the nuva ring in august, I am 10 weeks pregnant. There are people TTC who BD for a week straight during ovulation, and don’t get pregnant. It’s just because the real chance of getting pregnant is very small. It’s a very small window of opportunity if you really look into conception and how it all works. My FI and I probably had sex once a week, some weeks more some weeks less, because he works construction and is exhausted. Plus despite how you think your periods might be very regular, they actually might have more flucuation. I’m not sure how well you track them. But sometimes your O date can be late, or you might not have an O date. Or if your Leutal Phase is short, I believe that can give less opportunity then a longer Leutal Phase. I wouldn’t stress! Even people how have great fertility levels take many cycles to get pregnant! It’s really a timing game! And I think when you put so much into tracking your periods, you learn they arent as regular as you think, so one cycle your opportunity is lower and so on so forth.


I wouldn’t stress out! I believe they don’t tell you to worry until youre past 6 months of really really TTC. doing all the tracking and everything.

Post # 5
1081 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

How often are you having sex?  And are your cycles pretty regular? There are some great approaches to being more active in TTC that don’t involve full-on charting (although I absolutely LOVED charting and loved having all that information about what was going on with my body).  Would you be willing to do ovulation predictor tests?  They are super easy and take literally only a few minutes out of your day, you don’t even have to do them every day of your cycle, and you can get super cheap ones off of Amazon.  You could try the “Sperm Meets Egg Plan” if you do these, and have sex every other day starting on CD8, then start doing the OPKs around CD10 and once you get a positive, you have sex that day and two days in a row after, skip a day, then once more for good measure (in case for some reason you O late) and after that it doesn’t matter how often you have sex while you wait for your period (or hopefully a BFP).  You don’t have to continue doing the OPKs after you get a positive.  

It seems like “work” and seems like it would “take the fun out of it,” but I still made sure to try and keep DH out of the loop with all I was doing with charting, temping, and OPKs so the sex wasn’t just, “we HAVE to do it today, so pull out your thing and let’s get it over with.”  I felt better as the time was drawing closer to when AF was supposed to arrive that I had armed myself with as much info and we gave ourselves the best chance of getting pregnant that month  as we could by hitting all the “important” days (O-3, O-2, O-1, and O).  He LOVED all the sex we had to try and make a baby, and when it was during my fertile window, it was much more enjoyable for me since I had more natural CM and was more “in the mood” anyways.  We also had always used some type of lube, so during our 2nd month of TTC I got pre-seed (sperm-friendly lube) since the normal lube we were using can inhibit sperm.  This was a lifesaver and allowed to us to have pretty dang enjoyable baby-making sex ;).  Most of the time we would both have a drink or 2 beforehand as well to get us more in the mood.  

I guess what I’m getting at is just because you add more tools to your TTC process, doesn’t mean it has to take the fun and romanticism out of it!  It’s all in how you approach it.  Sure, I could have shoved my positive OPKs in my DH’s face and been like, “Umm, see this? This means we HAVE to have sex right now, so go on and get naked and get it up.” <— NOT very romantic haha… I would give him much more subtle clues that it was “prime-time” like, “You better get ready to rock my world tonight!” Or I would even lie and say, “I am just SO in the mood, I need you like NOW.”  I think he probably felt like a sex tiger with what all I would say to him to make sure he was excited to do it in the fertile window…hahaha.  Now that I’m pregnant we are both very much missing the “baby-making sex” since DTD has not been super comfortable while being pregnant. Oh well.  

One more thing is that regardless of what you decide to do/don’t do, if you do get closer to that 1 year mark of having pretty frequent unprotected sex, you can surely add on the charting, etc., but it would probably be a good idea for you AND your DH to go get checked out to make sure there are no problems that need addressed in terms of fertility.  As many as 1 in 6 or 7 couples have some fertility issue, 40% of the time it’s the female, 40% of the time it’s the male, and the remaining percent are a combination of both the female and male have a problem.

Sorry for the long post…I wish you the best of luck!  I hope all this doesn’t even matter and you get your BFP soon, it just stinks that for some people, getting pregnant surely isn’t as easy as they make it seem in high school sex ed, huh?!   

Post # 6
2227 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

This is pretty much the exact question that this bee posted yesterday. I think all the advice is 200% applicable to you.

October is a long time to wait if you have some fertility problems. I think it would be worth charting ASAP if it’s stressing you out…


Post # 8
4804 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

@monet11:  I think that having sex once a week is definitely your issue.  With TTC the window is so small on when you can get pregnant in any given month.  I would suggest trying to have sex every other day starting about a week after your period ends for at least the next two weeks after that.  It’s tiring but usually gets the job done barring no other issues.

Post # 9
1272 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

@monet11:  I would also assume that it’s the frequency of sex that is your problem rather than assuming fertility problems at this point. While some resources day there are 5 fertile days a month, it seems for most people it’s more like 3, so sex once a week, or even twice, is very likely to miss those days.Also beware of becoming too reliant on an app estimating your fertile days, unless your OPKs and other O symptoms regularly support its predicted days. Most assume a luteal phase (second half of cycle) of 14 days, but many women have luteal phases of 11-12 days. Good luck 🙂


Post # 10
6701 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2011 - Baby boy 12/2015

@monet11:  Definitely have more sex, once a week won’t do it unless you are lucky. It is possible but highly unlikely. Even for those of us who chart, it is hard to know exactly what day we O’d.

When DH and I start TTC, it would have to be at least every other day around our fertile window and will continue until O is confirmed. Remember that egg only has 12-24 hours to be fertilized, then it dies. 

Post # 11
308 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Even if you do not decide to chart.  You should consider looking on Fertility Friend.com.- watch the videos and info that is all free.  It takes about 20-30 min for the basic stuff.  I had no idea just how much of a lottery it truly is to conceive!


Post # 12
5889 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2010

@monet11:  Keep in mind 2 things 1) you only need to have sex once a month, if you time it right. 2) Most fertility docs will tell you it can take up to a year for a healthy couple to get pregnant. Dont start to worry just yet.

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