(Closed) Should I be worried about his strange web searches?

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
1645 posts
Bumble bee

Guys have to buy underwear, but they don’t constantly look at men in underwear online. Not straight guys anyway. I wouldn’t have questioned the first one, as he may have genuinely just been shopping, but the new and increased searches? And many different websites? Again–straight men don’t care THAT much about underwear. I think you two need to have a chat.

Post # 4
Member
6597 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2010

I am not going to lie – if I found this I would be concerned. There is nothing wrong with anyone exploring their sexuality but I would want to know that my Fiance was sure in his sexuality before he married me.

Post # 5
Member
486 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

WOW. This is a red flag. Don’t hold on to this and marry him. I would go talk to him with an open mind and don’t make it super serious just casually bring it up when you are searching for something online…Maybe make a joke with a open ended question and wait for his response. If he is interested in men it seems like he would have at least deleted the searches..is he tech smart? Because if so maybe he wanted you to see it..

After you get his response to you finding the sites go from there…

Post # 6
Member
4313 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

To answer your question: yes.  And I would approach him (in a loving way of course) about it.

Post # 7
Member
1124 posts
Bumble bee

I asked FH and he gave me a very strange “why would anyone do that?!” look and said “maybe if I was into naked dudes”. He says a straight man would much prefer to find a scientific website describing muscle growth with men as clothed as possible.

It’s always possible that he is just comparing himself/looking at muscle structure… but the amount you’re talking about seems way overboard. I think a chat is in order.

Post # 8
Member
2204 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Is it possible that these sites “popped” up when he was looking at other things…?? Or maybe he’s trying to do something with his workout routine…?

100% honesty here: he knows you use the computer and didn’t try to delete the computer history….a conversation is definately needed.

Post # 9
Member
1851 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

You need to talk with him IMMEDIATELY! This is not normal behavior (for straight men), and if he has a legit reason for looking at these sites, I’m sure you’d love to hear it. Do NOT feed him any excuses (Or the convo might go like this:”Have you been looking at these websites to compare your body?” “Ummmm…yes!”).

Post # 10
Member
249 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

People don’t always watch european group sex because they want to have european group sex, but they wouldn’t search it out if it didn’t turn them on. Approach without judgement, as hard as it may be, and be ready to hear something you may not like. But you must discuss this before the wedding!

Post # 11
Member
10288 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011

Most men just buy underwear, they don’t really research them first. I just asked my Fiance if he has ever checked out mens underwear online and the answer was a big, fat no.

Even checking out the underwear seems weird to me but the pictures of the naked men is obviously a red flag. If he’s bi-sexual then you’ll have to reevaluate your relationship. I would highly suggest you talk to him about this.. 

Post # 12
Member
575 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Wow, you need to have a conversation, sooner rather than later.  Like others have posted, do it in a loving, non-judgemental way.  It seems like odd behavior, and there could be a “good” explanation or one that you may not like, but you should bring this up ASAP.

Post # 14
Member
870 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

No. Guys don’t do that. Not unless they want to look at guys in underwear.

Just bring it up truthfully. Say you were looking at the history to find a wedding inspiration and you noticed he had been looking at a lot of sites with semi-nude men and you were wondering what he was doing on them.

It can be as simple as that. 

Post # 15
Member
5761 posts
Bee Keeper

Why are you afraid to approach him about this? Don’t you want to know what you’re up against now rather than later? Seriously? This is not normal behavior for a guy…unless he’s interested in other guys.

Post # 16
Member
249 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

*bulldozes fence you are sitting on*

There is no question of whether you should. You MUST. 

The topic ‘Should I be worried about his strange web searches?’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors