(Closed) Should I Bring It Up?…..

posted 8 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
Member
429 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

I would silently do the planning on my own. Only because you don’t want to get your hopes too high and be let down AND sometimes the more talk of it (even if they’re in agreeance), the more risk that they freak out and run! And if you said “I really don’t want to talk about this anymore until theirs real planning we can do”, it might give him that extra push to get on the stick!

Post # 4
Member
1543 posts
Bumble bee

I would ask him to politely refrain from all the pre-planning talk, and explain to him why. That every time he mentions it, it gets your hopes up that it will be coming sooner than it actually is. Talk of future plans without a timeline only disappoints you, but at the same time, a specific timeline would take the romance and surprise out of it. Tell him to keep mum until he does the deed, but reassure him that as soon as he makes it official, already, you guys can gab wedding plans from sun-up to sun-down, lol ๐Ÿ™‚

Good luck with your sanity, and keep us posted ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 5
Member
322 posts
Helper bee

I agree with the PPs. I would just tell him that you don’t want to do all the pre-planning so far in advance and that you would like to wait until it’s real. Then just plan with us on here ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 6
Member
375 posts
Helper bee

I wouldn’t talk about pre-planning with him. (Still do it on your own) If he asks, say that you need a ring on your finger before you can continue because you’ve done as much as you can do while being single.

PS which Florida team do you cheer on?

Post # 8
Member
375 posts
Helper bee

ASK for a proposal timeline!!!! DO IT!

If you’re already planning and want to be married next October, you should know! I’m planning on a Fall 2011 wedding too and am a little antsy not knowing because time is getting short.

Post # 9
Member
322 posts
Helper bee

I think if you ask for a timeline that could put pressure on him as well as ruin the surprise. Perhaps you could ask if he thinks it will be more than 6 months or something more vague like that. Just let him know that is fine and you are ok with it being that far away but that you need to put the planning on hold until then.

Post # 10
Member
375 posts
Helper bee

Yeah, I agree with mc77. You don’t need a specific date. My bf said Fall, so that’s any time up until Dec 20 I guess…

Post # 11
Member
14419 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

With all the discussions and planning going on, Id say you were pretty much engaged already and the “proposal” is just logistics.  If he did wait until April, would you still have enough time to plan and put together a wedding by next October if thats when you want to get married?  If so, Id just silently wait and continue minor discussions and planning, its obviously on the way.  If its not enough time, make sure he knows that and give him a little nudge so that you can start the booking (unless you dont mind really planning before the offical proposal, which is also known to happen)

Post # 13
Member
14419 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

If he’s delaying cause he’s not ready to do the deed even though he can talk about it, talking about getting a hard set date may feel like a lot of pressure to him, vs just daydreaming/talking about a wedding.  Not tomorrow, but sooner is very contradictary… odd!  Good luck tonight!

Post # 15
Member
935 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2015

Oh that is so cool. YAY!

Post # 16
Member
375 posts
Helper bee

Cheers!! That’s great news!!!

I have a little game going for myself as to when he’ll propose- you should do it too!! I’m betting on November, maybe around thanksgiving?

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