(Closed) Should I call off the wedding?

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
14486 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

If it were me, and I caught my Fiance telling his ex that he still loved her, I’d be out that door so fast I dont think he would have had the chance to defend himself.

 

Post # 4
Member
947 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

I think you need to have a conversation with him then have sometime apart. 

Post # 5
Member
3686 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

He told his ex-girlfriend that he loved her and was having doubts about you only to get her to reply? I don’t think so. I would break things off with him.

How old are the two of you?

Also, looking through your pasts posts, it seems like the two of you have been having problems for at least the last eight months.

Post # 6
Member
4336 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

out the door. and i wouldnt care if it slammed him in the face.

Post # 7
Member
1487 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Yeah, I’d be out the door on this one too.

I once found naked pictures of my 1st husband’s ex on our shared computer (dumbass) and he told me

“They were on a friend’s computer, so I made him send them to me so I could keep them as blackmail against him.”

They’re just excuses, not explanations.  And frankly, I wouldn’t believe anything else he said.

Post # 8
Member
1710 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2013 - Walt Disney World

Time to break up and leave, without question or doubt.  Hugs!

Post # 9
Member
452 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

@cmbr:  +1. That’s not really a normal thing to do to get a person to reply to a message. I know some people stay friends with exes, but I also don’t think it’s a usual thing to contact an ex about “relationship advice”.

I’d be out the door if I found something like this, especially when he’s denying and “explaining” it to you. Sorry this has happened!

ETA: reading through some of your old posts quickly, there are a multitude of reasons you should be thinking about breaking things off with him

Post # 10
Member
2553 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

I don’t really think this is the grounds for a successful marriage. If it were me, I would constantly be doubting him and struggling to find trust.

Post # 11
Member
604 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2014 - Narrawallee reserve/beach & Mollymook golf club

I’m sure there are plently of other people he could have asked for relationship advice who would have replied without him telling them that he loves them. Either the two of you go to counselling, or you just straight up go.

Post # 12
Member
8472 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

I don’t think you two were meant to be together. He should not still be in love with someone else. Save yourself the heartache. 

Post # 13
Member
3092 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Oh gosh what a doofus your bf is.  He needs to graduate from college and get out on his own two feet.  He will probably realize very quickly how lucky he was to have you as his lady.  By that time you will either have moved on to bigger or better or you can expect him to be the equal partner you deserve.  You may also move on but give him another chance down the road (that happend with my Fiance though he wasn’t playing games like your bf…just needed time to grow up after college 🙂

ETA: I didn’t realize he was your FI!!!!  Heck no!  Kick his sorry butt to the curb.  This is college kid behavior not a grown ass man who is about to make a life long committment.

Post # 14
Member
4193 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry

He sounds far too immature to get married.  

Post # 15
Member
958 posts
Busy bee

I’d be gone. Doubt tears apart a relationship and if you stay with him, you’ll always wonder.

Post # 16
Member
427 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

@pinkshoes:  +1 this is so true and exactly what I’d do.

What a joke. Yes I think you should leave and he will be sorry you are gone, but this is outrageous behaviour for a future husband and I also think from your post this isn’t an isolated incident.

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