- 4 years ago
- Wedding: October 2014
My mom is new to using computers and I set up a Facebook page upon her request. She’s very rusty using it, but gets the jist of it. She was having some issue using it and called me. I missed her call so she called my SIL (my brother’s wife) on the phone for help. My SIL asked for her email and password. That was about two months ago.
My mom called me today very upset. SIL has been monitoring my mom’s FB without my mom’s knowledge.(!) She has been erasing messages and denying friend requests. My mom doesn’t go onto her FB page every day, so she didn’t know.
There’s a back story. My brother cheated on my SIL a couple of years ago. The woman he had an affair with had twins. We didn’t find out about any of this until the twins were born. We know nothing about the twins or the woman. My SIL and brother refuse to talk about it and are adament they aren’t his kids. They will not disclose to us any contact information.
It’s upsetting because they swept it under the rug and never got a paternity test. My mom and I have always wondered about these kids that could be my niece and nephew/my mom’s grandchildren. It’s now been a year since this all came to light.
This woman tried to contact my mom today on FB. But my SIL was signed into my mom’s FB and intercepted it.
I’m livid because:
1. My SIL is deliberately monitoring and invading my mom’s private Facebook account without my mom’s consent.
2. She’s deciding/dictating who my mom can and can’t talk to.
3. This means she’s been monitoring my mom’s FB for months secretly.
4. My mom and I talk privately on FB messaging. This means she’s more likely than not, given her nature, read all of the message exchanges between me and my mom. And who knows who else?
My SIL called my mom up and told her she erased this woman’s friend request and blocked her on my mom’s behalf. She sternly told my mom the woman is a crazy person and they (SIL & brother) don’t want my mom talking to her.
My mom is a big pushover. She has never stood up to my bossy SIL, so she didn’t say anything. But after she hung up the phone she called me upset and told me everything.
I REALLY want to confront my SIL about this whole thing, but my mom pleaded for me not to. I changed my mom’s password on both FB and the email connected to it.
My mom said that should be enough. I told my mom she needs to put my SIL in her place and stand up to her. It’s like someone going through your room, looking through your stuff and instead of you confronting them about it, you just change your locks.
Should I confront my SIL about this? She’s not rational (obviously) and been known to throw temper tantrums. If you think yes, what should I say?