- 9 months ago
My best friend and I have known each other since we were six. We have been inseparable since we were children and I’m the first person he came out to when he realized he was gay, which was a huge deal for him. I am incredibly close to his family and consider them a second family. I work in a different city now but when I go home, I stay with them because their house is bigger than my dad’s house and they have an extra bedroom I stay in. I have always been around my friends brother but we’ve never really talked until recently.
About six month ago, I broke up with my boyfriend of a few years. It was a hard time for me but it was for the best. Since we broke up, my friend and his mom keep not-so-subtly hinting that I should date his older brother. I have been told by a few people his brother has been interested in me for a while but we never seem to be single at the same time. He is a really nice guy and we have so much in common. We are both avid sailers, we are both engineers and I have a lot of respect for him. My mom passed away a few years ago and my dad has been really lonely since so he takes my dad to breakfast a few times a month to hang out.
But despite all that, it sound weird but I’m just not attracted to him. At first, I thought it was because he was on the shorter side and I usually date guys who are tall but recently, I casually dated a guy who was his height and I was crazy attracted to that guy. Objectively, my friends brother is a very good looking guy. Growing up, girls would always try to be friends with me so they could get to know him because they knew I was close to his family. But I just can’t get myself to think that. I feel so shallow because he really is my ideal guy besides that.
I guess I’m not so sure what to do. He’s started messaging me recently and we have a great time talking but I feel so bad that my heart isn’t totally in it. If he asks me out, which it seems to be getting to that point, should I try it out and see how it goes? Or is attraction too big of a deal breaker? Any advice would be much appreciated!