(Closed) Should I end my engagement?

posted 6 years ago in Relationships
  • poll: Should I end my engagement?

    Yes

    No

  • Post # 16
    Member
    1037 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2014 - Merritt Winery

    View original reply
    NervousNellie:  yuck, this situation is awful to be in. As someone who spent wayyyy too long in an engagement that I knew deep inside was not a good place, I can tell you to go with your gut here. If you have these types of deep questions about this relationship, you already have the answer. 

    I knew I should have ended that relationship. But I spent 7 years knowing the answers to all of my questions about it.  I’m so glad I ended it now. You know that you deserve better. You know that your SO would not make a good husband or father. Good luck to you! And thank you for sharing  

    Post # 17
    Member
    664 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: December 1969

    ignore what he’s saying and look at what he’s doing because that’s how he really feels. He does not want to get married. He should be honest and tell you that but instead he’s stringing you along and confusing you. That’s not right and you don’t and shouldn’t have to put up with that. If I were you, I would end the engagement AND the relationship. This isn’t healthy.

    Post # 18
    Member
    889 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 2015

    i accidentally clicked no, thinking the question was “should i go through with it.” just so you know that the one “no” vote was meant to be yes, as in yes you should end it.

    i could honestly have forgiven the drunk proposing–the drunken mouth does not usually lie–but literally everything after that is BS. i would tell him that since he can’t decide what type of wedding he wants, you’ve decided for him: NOT one. then i’d take that $700 you had planned to put on the small wedding, and move out (if you live together) and take a vacation by yourself. also if it wasn’t clear i’d end the engagement and the relationship simultaneously.

    hope it gets better 🙂

    Post # 19
    Member
    229 posts
    Helper bee

    This man needs to grow up. He’s telling you what you want to hear to keep you sweet and to stop you from leaving him. 

    He has no intentions of marrying you and lucky you! Because you do not want to be ties down to this a-whole.

    reading your post reminded me of my ex so much! Get out now and hold your head high lady! 

    Men like this really anger me! Grrrrr 

    Sorry your going through this sweetie x

    Post # 20
    Member
    1863 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: March 2014

    RUN!!!!!!

    Post # 21
    Member
    2347 posts
    Buzzing bee

    View original reply
    NervousNellie:  Don’t believe what he tells you, believe what he SHOWS you. 

    This man does not want to marry you, and frankly you deserve better. He sounds like an absolute asshole. 

    Post # 22
    Member
    268 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: December 2025

    View original reply
    MrsBuesleBee:  +1

    Obviously you’re not happy. Otherwise you wouldn’t be writing here and asking for opinions. If you’re not happy, why are you still with him?

    Post # 23
    Member
    56 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: July 2014

    He’s a douche. Listen to your gut and don’t go through with this.

    Post # 24
    Member
    1862 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: April 2006

    If a man wants to make a woman his wife, he’ll move heaven and earth to make sure she’s his forever. That doesn’t sound like your situation. Put a ring on it dude and lock this girl down if you love her and want her in your life forever! OP, you deserve better than some wishy-washy, spineless man with zero integrity or maturity. Get the heck out before your self esteem plummets and you waste more of your time.

    Post # 25
    Member
    536 posts
    Busy bee

    yup, you should end it.

    Post # 26
    Member
    471 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2018

    It seems like he can deal with things as abstract, far-future ideas, but when they become real he can’t handle it. Move out, but don’t take him back when he panics because he’s losing you. That’s not an emotional state for either of you to make decisions. Live on your own a while, date other people, and if you can’t live without him specifically and not just a partner, evaluate the situation down the road. Just don’t be swayed by trying to be the “sensitive caring fiancee” and pandering to his emotions. You have needs too. Specifically, in this case you need open communication. If he just shuts down, he’s not mature enough for marriage.

    Post # 27
    Member
    1882 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    View original reply
    NervousNellie:  good lord, he sounds manipulative and emotionally abusive! Why on earth would you want to marry this guy? The constant blowing up at you is not ok. Walk away from him immediately.

    Post # 28
    Member
    109 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: June 2016

    Who the heck voted “No?”

    Post # 29
    Member
    660 posts
    Busy bee

    He is playing games. He do not want to marry you. Yes end your engagement you can do 1000000 times better.

    Post # 30
    Member
    2606 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2009

    View original reply
    danicaj:  Who the heck voted “No?”

    MrsHalpert explained that she misread the question, and voted “no” by mistake based on that.  So basically it’s unanimous that the OP should get out.

    The topic ‘Should I end my engagement?’ is closed to new replies.

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