Post # 1
Good morning, Bees!
I was engaged this past December, and my now-husband and I agreed to get married just the 2 of us first, and then have a ceremony for our friends and family later. I loved the idea and we got married in January. We had a little “elopement” planned, but we decided to just go to the county registrar because that money was basically the deposit for the venue that we chose. I’m glad we went, and am OVERJOYED that we are married, but it was just so quick and was even HAPPIER that we were going to put the deposit on the venue within the next 2 weeks.
Well, life has happened.
Each time we have the money together for the deposit, something CRAZY happens and we have to spend the money. I wanted to have the wedding next summer because I felt that putting it off much longer would be silly becside we are already married. I’ve lost hope now, and am very sad and even considering just accepting our status as it occurred and moving on. I feel that I’ll always regret it though. I have knots in my stomach as I type this.
Anyone else ever in a similar situation? Or just wanna give advice and/or words of encouragement?
Post # 2
Is there maybe a compromise here that would work? Like a reception over the summer by a lake, or in a nice restaurant? That way you can celebrate your marriage with everyone but not deal with the expenses and stress that tend to come with the wedding and ceremony. I’m sorry things haven’t gone according to plan!
Post # 3
Since you aren’t really in a place financially to have a ceremony for friends/family I would consider having a vow renewal in 5-10 years when it may be more financially achievable.
Post # 4
The place I chose is a restaurant. I’m going to go back to the drawing board and see if there’s some super great deal I’ve overlooked. Thanks for the input.
That crossed my mind today, and boy did it sting. The thought of a vow renewal that far in the future really hurts my feelings, but it’s definitely more feasible at this point. Maybe I’m just in a poor frame of mind, but I feel that it won’t even matter by that time. I imagine feeling that too much time has passed. Asking someone who has done it might help with my perception. Thank you very much for the suggestion
Post # 5
My husband and I have been together 9 years (it’ll be 10 in a few months), and officially married over 2 years. We had the exact same predicament you had; we just weren’t financially able to have a reception or anything fancy. This year we are doing a vow renewal as a wedding reception. Though it hurt to have to put it off each time, it still feels special to us. Over two years in the making, and it doesn’t feel as if any of the joy has diminished. In fact, we now have more to celebrate than we did then. 🙂 I can’t say whether you would feel the same, but that’s just been our experience.
Also, I’m wearing pearls for the ceremony. I know many cultures think pearls are a bad omen, because they represent tears, but to me they represent the tears of sorrow AND of joy that we have already shed – and that we’ll continue to shed, hopefully. lol To me, having the ceremony later just makes it even more meaningful. Again, just my thoughts. 🙂
Post # 6
I like the way you described it as having more to celebrate. It’s such a beautiful (and true) way to look at it! I’m glad you had a wonderful day, pearls and all! 2 years is what we’re looking at right now just like you, so I’m very happy you have shared your experience with me. Thank you