(Closed) Should I feel left out?

posted 7 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
981 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I’m sorry your feelings were hurt, but it is up to her to choose who she wants as bridesmaids. She must have had reasons for choosing as she did, and she isn’t required to share them. Please remember that you were part of the wedding – you were there! You weren’t wearing a matching dress and holding a bouquet, but really that’s about all that a bridesmaid does. I don’t think that boycotting her wedding because you don’t like the bridal party choices was the right thing for your relatives to do.

Post # 4
Member
1434 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: February 2010

@allieluvs21: while everything kitkat said was true….let’s be real here: OF COURSE YOU FELT LEFT OUT. I’d feel incredibly hurt and sad. I don;t know if you should or even can say anything at this point, it’s done and overwith…but yeah, you’re feeling are totally justified. I’d be so confused. .. As i’m sure many of the guests of the wedding were too?

Post # 6
Member
3624 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@KitKatNYC: This isn’t the point. The point is that OP felt left out because her sister didn’t choose her as a bridesmaid without explanation. I would be so pissed.

Post # 8
Member
7519 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2010

I think I would be upset too.  But I am surprised that it upset your grandmother and father enough to not attend the wedding.  That seems harsh.  I mean, ultimately it was her choice.  Was there other factors involved?

Post # 10
Member
142 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I recently attended my Future Sister-In-Law wedding all the groom had a brother he was best man, his wife was Maid/Matron of Honor there two boys were page boys. Future Sister-In-Law had her daughter as flowergirl, her little sister as bridesmaid, her other brother as Usher and mum and dad walked her down the aisle. My Fiance her big brother… nothing didn’t even get an invite to the last minute, our kids weren’t involved or anything.

There was no reason for this at all she had been asked to be a bridesmaid at our wedding way before this and her daughter a flower girl. and money was not an issue

My Fiance acted like he didn’t care as men do but he did. He actually told me to post on this that you have every right to be upset its like she was playing favourites with her sisters which is unfair.

As a result of my FSIL’s actions she is no longer a bridesmaid why should I include her in my wedding if she can’t include her own brother when she included everyone else

Post # 11
Member
7385 posts
Busy Beekeeper

The circumstances as outlined would have left me feeling some kind of way as well. She never should have asked you to begin with. All that flip flopping “your in, your out” certainly didn’t help matters.  At minimum she should have given you a heads up about the changes after inviting you to be Bridesmaid or Best Man, then recinding, then adding more poeple to the party. Its a given that she was under no obligation to ask you and can do as she pleased. However, all the back and forth was unecessary and lacked tact. 

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