Post # 1
I have four bridesmaids standing up in my wedding. Lets call them, L, B, C, and R.
B tends to schedule lots of things in a week. It’s been hard of me to get in toch with her but she keeps claiming that she really wants to be a part of the wedding planning. I keep forgiving her because I don’t want to make a big deal out of nothing when I know she is a busy person and there is nothing I can do to change her. L is also busy and works nights at a local hospital. She is always going to weddings and being in them or hanging out with her friends drinking. R is my brothers girlfriend. I’ve been having some problems with her not being there for me. We went bm dress shopping, she would poo poo everything I picked out. C is probably going to end up being my Maid/Matron of Honor (I haven’t picked one yet) and I’ve had no problems with her being completely checked in.
For about a two weeks now I’ve been trying to plan a time for all four of us to get together so we can have lunch and we can all, for once be on the same page. I was thinking a weekend day in september for lunch. L told me not the second week. The first wk was already taken, and R said not the third week because of my brother and hers anniversary. Today I put in the request off book at work Sep 24th and texted everyone. L texts me back saying “I’m going to a wedding that day”.
Should I go ahead and keep lunch that day or move it to october before those days at work fill up too? I really wanted to get this done in September so I could cross another thing off my list.
Post # 3
If the others are on board, I’d keep the lunch date. Then I’d tell L, “Okay, that’s fine. But how about you & I get together on Sep 15th (or whatever date after the lunch meeting) to go over things and let you know what’s going on (or expected)”.
Post # 4
Would it be offensive that I didn’t give in and went ahead instead of planning another time?
Post # 5
No, I don’t think so. We had to do it that way w/ one of my girls & she understood. You can’t plan your days around others. But if she’s the type to be wishy-washy just tell her, “Okay, lets get together @ Mimi’s @ 7:00pm on Tuesday the 28th to talk about plans”, that way you’re setting a firm tone.
Post # 6
Is it really that important to have a lunch? All of my bridesmaids are in different cities, so we keep completely in touch via email. At least once a month I send out a “this is what’s going on right now” kind of email, and they reply as necessary. Sometimes people just have such oddball schedules that getting everyone together at the same time is kind of impossible.
Or, what about a Sunday lunch? People are often less busy on Sundays…
Post # 7
Well the reasons I was really hoping to have a lunch are these:
- none of my girls are from out of town, the furthest they live away is 15-20 minutes
- most of the girls haven’t met each other yet and I think it would be a nice time to get to know each other
- It’s so much easier for me to get together with them for a luncheon to show them what I was planning so I could get everyones feed back at once. It’s very difficult for me to text/email the one girl and then find out what she’s doing. Maybe I’m just not a huge email type of person. I don’t like to use it as often.
Post # 8
Could you do a lunch during the week, assuming that works with L’s evening work schedule? I know that weekends (Saturdays in particular) get really busy for folks.