Post # 1
Recently I have been having a diificult time trying to decide if I should go to my fiance’s best friend’s wedding.
The back story:
I don’t necessarily care for the bride to be, but I don’t dislike her. The truth is that I honestly just don’t care for or about her, if she makes the groom happy…Awesome. Now a few months ago my fiance kept getting calls from the groom asking if what I posted on facebook was about the bride. Yes, this is stupid. But I in no way shape or form did I ever post anything to upset her or about her. After about the 3rd call I decided to just delete her as a friend on facebook because it was not worth the drama, when I NEVER posted a thing about her. In my mind I though “problem solved”, little did I know that she checked my page often, as I never checked hers because I really don’t know her all that well and wouldn’t consider her a friend. Well apperantly I caused the ___ to hit the fan for deleting her. She sent me an ugly message to which I responded telling her I would not give into her behavior because all it is going to do is make more problems and it’s not worth it….well she kept sending me messages insulting me and I had enough and gave into the conversation. I’m so upset and embarrased in partaking in such a foolish confrontation. Well then she uninvited me to the wedding. I was very upset about this because it is my fiance’s best friends wedding too and my fiance is the best man. This past weekend I ran into the groom and he said that he is vetoing her and he really wants me to be there. I initially told him that I would have to think about it. My fiance really wants me to be there with him, but I’m really struggling with feeling uncomfortable at the wedding because I’m sure she is going to be catty and I’m not sure I want to go through it. On the other hand I want to be there for my friend and my fiance.
Should I attend a wedding that I was uninvited by the bride but then invited again by the groom?
Post # 3
It hardly seems worth it after the drama, but I understand wanting to support your fiance and his friend. What I’d suggest is presenting your mixed feelings to your fiance and ask him what he would like. If he thinks it will stir up drama and isn’t a great idea, sit this one out and if he wants you there, then you ought to go.
Post # 4
Go for the groom and your Fiance.
Post # 5
My initial thought was no way! But considering that the groom is your FI’s best friend I thinkin this situation I would go to support him. If it was a wedding that neither of you cared to attend that much it would be different.
Post # 6
Would it be possible to meet the bride for coffee and clear the air?
Post # 7
i wouldn’t go. I think it’s fine enough that your fiance go but it doesn’t sound like the couple really cares if you are there are not.
Post # 8
If the bride doesn’t want you there I don’t think you should go. Unless you speak to her directly and resolve the miscommunications, I think it would extremely uncomfortable and not fair on either of you.
Post # 9
I would go. Be the bigger person and be there for the groom and your Fiance.
Post # 10
eek. I’m on the fence about this one. My initial reaction was no to go but I can see why you’d want to go to support your Fiance and his best friend. Is the guest list large? If so, it may not be so awkward for you and she might not notice you are there right away. I highly doubt the bride will cause a scene with you on her wedding day. I don’t blame you for not wanting to go though.
Post # 11
even if you both don’t really mean it, at least the air will be cleared so it’s not so awkward. Cuz i would also want to go to support Fiance and his friend. I imagine your Fiance being there without you and having to deal with all kinds of questions from other people about your whereabouts and that would suck for him. the bride hopefully will be preoccupied with more important things on her wedding day than being catty to you.
Post # 12
I wouldn’t go until you resolve this with the bride. The bride doesn’t want you there…do you know who is paying for the wedding? If it’s the bride’s parents then be prepared to asked to leave if she throws a fit about it.
Your FI’s bf needs to have a chat with her too. If Fiance invited someone that I clearly did not want there, I would be livid.
Post # 13
I agree, I wouldn’t go until you and the bride are on good terms. A little talk with her would probaly clear the air, and you guys could hear each others side of the story. If you didn’t resolve it with the bride, I wouldn’t go, I think you would just feel uncomfotable the whole time.
Post # 14
i would probably want to get the ok from the bride in this case. regardless of wanting to support your fi and his best friend, you are going to feel incredibly awkward being in a place where you know are unwelcomed. have the groom talk to the bride so that she at least knows that you are coming.
i agree with pp. do you think it’s possible to discuss your differences with the bride? you don’t have to become bff’s but i’m guessing that since the guys are bf’s, she will be invited to your wedding next year.
Post # 15
There is no way in hell I would go near that wedding….
Post # 16
- Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry
I really like the idea of meeting with her to clear the air. Due to your FI/her FI’s relationship, this isn’t someone you really can ignore.