Post # 1
My best friend has said she would like to go wedding dress shopping with me. We are planning to go to Eva’s or House of Brides June 9th. Is it bad that I kinda only want her to go and not my mom and sister? My mom and sister went with me last time (very short and non-productive day…really just for fun). My sister is super critical and always has something negative to say. My mom is opinionated but not that bad. However, if I bring my mom I know my sister will want to go…they kind of come as a pair. My friend will be supportive and give her honest but nicest opinions. Should I go without telling my mom and sister? Is that bad? What if I find the dress?
Post # 3
I went by myself because I wanted to gauge how only I felt in the dress, not how other people perceived me. You know on Say Yes to the Dress when the bride loves a dress but her sister is like a total biotch about it and it wrecks her day? Yeah, I didn’t want any of that criticism, and you’re wise for wanting to go without it as well.
You don’t have to keep it a secret from your mom and sister, but you by no means have to invite them. I would just go and say you stumbled upon a really great dress when you were casually looking for BM dresses with your friend. If they really care, it’s because they’re looking for something to be upset about. It’s your dress and they shouldn’t take it personally.
Post # 4
Will you be sad if they aren’t there when you find your dream dress? Will you ever look back and think ‘aw, I wish I had seen my moms reaction when I tried on my dress’? If so, invite them. Ignore your sister.
If not, go with your friend and have a blast!
Post # 5
I think you should judge the dress you try on before leaving the changing room, decide how you feel and then block out others judgement. Just listen to the judgement you trust.
Or tell your family you don’t want negative opinions from them, because it makes it hard to make the decision.
My sister was verrrry judgemental and harsh on all the dressed I liked. & she was also the biggest fan of my least favorite dress. My dressing room didnt have a mirror so I was really sad I didnt get to make my own opinion before coming out and hearing “ohhh that one is perfect” or “that looks weird” “Nope its not this one”
At the end of the day I went with what I wanted and listened to my mom since she was the only one making sure I got what I wanted and not what she wanted. My sister didnt like my dress and made fun of part of it until I bought it and she saw it altered for me.
Post # 6
@Lily_of_the_valley: Go with your friend and if you find your dress take your Mum and sis back afterwards
Post # 7
@Lily_of_the_valley: I brought my sister because she has a critical eye, but she also has very strong opionions and ideas on what I should do/wear for my wedding so it became a little conflicting. My mother doesn’t really have much opinion about wedding dresses because she’s used to shopping for Sarees (we’re indian). Next time, i’m bringing a bridesmaid.
Post # 9
I wouldn’t take anyone that is going to be critical, even if it is your sister. This should be a fun day for you. It can be confusing enough to decide on a dress, not to mention if someone is being judgemental on top of it.
Post # 10
Bring all three and let them know ahead of time that you want constructive criticism and not negative or unhepful comments. Your mom and sister might be hurt that you chose a friend over them since this is often a mother/sister/daughter thing for many people. A relative of mine took her FSIL and friend to get her dress and her mother was totally heartbroken when she found out. It was sad.
Post # 11
I did a couple with my mom and friends and it was a mess. I later just went with FI since I really only cared about his opinion and my own and did not need a bunch of different people yapping in my ear. It worked out well and by the end we both got really good at explaining what I was looking for and so forth. He was actually a great help and I could not have done it without him.
Post # 12
you don’t need to have anyone there who is going to be negative. just go with your friend.
Post # 13
Take your friend. Once you have decided on a dress, circle back and do it with you mom and sis (if you still feel like doing it at that time).
Post # 14
Go with just your friend. I didn’t take my mom dress shopping with me (I don’t have a sister) – it wasn’t anything against her, it was just more convenient to go with my friend who lives close by. I picked a dress, and showed my mom the pics – she was happy for me. It wasn’t a big deal at all.
Post # 15
Hmm, I think generally the ladies that want to go with you just want the experience of seeing you in dresses. That being said, I would feel really bad for my best friend and my sister if they weren’t there when I tried on dresses for the first time, because they have both expressed a desire to. Maybe your mother and sister wouldn’t want to go again? I think you should figure out if it would be important to your mother and your sister. They are obviously important to you.
However, if you think it won’t be that big of a deal, then I think going with your friend is fine. Just snap a photo or two for the mom & sis.
Post # 16
Go with just your friend.