- 5 years ago
I have been dating my boyfriend for about 2 years. About 8 months ago, I moved from my home town to the city (700km away where i lived with my family) to be with my bf. At first, we were renting a house in the city and each paid rent. I work away for 7 days at a time, so my rent was less as I was only home for less than half of the time. we split the bills 50% and I almost always bought the groceries. I was always organized and paid rent and bills on time.
My bf has recently bought a big ski boat and decided to move into the house that he bought in the suburbs 6 years ago and has been renting out, so he can store his boat in the garage and we can have our own place. (he has always said he doesnt want to share a house with other people and his girlfriend). I moved in with him. And I paid for the removalists, which was around $700.
He has asked me to pay him $150 a week towards his mortgage. I also need to pay for half of the groceries, electricity and Internet. Up until this point I was the ONLY one buying the groceries and he was practically the ONLY one eating/using them as I still work away from home for a week at a time and would come home to an empty fridge and pantry everytime.
I recently lost my job and have used up all my savings and am very stressed about money. He makes considerably more money than me (he makes about twice as much as i do). although he went through a stressful time this year where his car broke down and cost him lots of money. I lent him the last $2000 I had from my savings to help him out, expecting he would pay me it back when he could. But he used $600 of that money for my first months rent to him, $400 to build gates for his house to keep my little dog in the yard, and the rest on my half of a holiday house for Christmas with all of his friends, which I didn’t want to go to or could not afford.
I didn’t care about this until I lost my job due to the QLD flood disaster and I had no money, but he was still demanding I pay him rent ASAP and I need to be more responsible. I have a new job and still waiting for my first pay check. I am so stressed about it. i need to start from scratch and my bf is expecting $2000 from me asap to pay him rent and car payments. He bought me a beautiful knew car last year but wanted to sell it so he could buy his boat. I agreed to take over the payments on the car because I need the car. So I have been paying him $560 a month for the car for the last 6 months. i am now one month behind on my car and rent payments to him. I thought he would just say “I know your struggling hun, don’t worry about the rent for now, just pay me for the car, and just pay me the rent when you get some savings back”. But no I still keep getting the lectures about being more responsible! I brought up that I was the only one buying $300 worth of groceries every fortnight and never asked him for a cent and since then he has been buying groceries, so that is good. I also brought up how I gave him my last $2000 when he needed help and never gave him lectures!
i just want to know what people think about him making me pay $150 a week towards his mortgage? i mean, we share a room, I am only there every second week, I do ALL the cleaning, I do the mowing and gardening and planning on redoing his gardens once I get on top of these bills. I have already made all the garden beds. And Up until now, I have bought all the groceries. I can’t help but feel a bit Hard done by.
It feels weird having to pay my boyfriend to live with him when he is supposed to love me and he wanted me to live with him! And the house completely belongs to him. I said we should rent out a room, but he said he doesn’t want to. He was going to propose to me last month (I accidentally found out through an email) and I had to tell him not to cause I was not sure he was the one for me at this stage. It was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. But the truth is, I am feeling like breaking up and moving back home with my family where I can relax about these money issues! He said if I marry him, the house will belong to both of us and my paying the mortgage will help to pay off the house sooner. But it just doesn’t feel right to me.
what do you guys think……..?
right now I am planning on paying him everything he wants as soon as I get my first pay check and packing my bags and moving back home to my family.