(Closed) Should I hold off going on the mortgage???

posted 8 years ago in Relationships
  • poll: Should I go on the Mortgage or not?

    Yes go on the mortgage

    No, don't do it!!!!

    Depends...(expanded below)

    Other (please explain)

  • Post # 3
    5427 posts
    Bee Keeper

    My fiance and I lived in my house for 4 years. I co-own the house with my mom. If he really wanted, it is in his rights as a common-law “husband”, when we sell the house, my mom gets half, I get half and he gets half of what I get! So you don’t have to be on the mortgage … just live with him… LOL

    Oh, and if he wants…. a pre-nup agreement would be best if it’s security is what he’s after.

    Post # 4
    2065 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: December 2011

    I’d just live with him. Getting on the mortgage involves having to refinance the mortgage and it’s quite a hassle. My husband bought the house in 2008, we met and I moved in during 2010 and we’re just now going through the refinance process in order to get a better rate AND add me on.

    Post # 5
    2393 posts
    Buzzing bee

    Has he asked you to go in on the mortage? (If so, what reasons did he give for why he thinks it would be a good idea?)

    Or is this just something you’re wondering about hypothetically?


    Personally, I wouldn’t do it.



    Post # 7
    2393 posts
    Buzzing bee

    View original reply

    I agree with your BF… pay off the student loans first. If he already owns the home and has his name on the mortgage, I can’t see any good reason for adding your name to it in the meantime. Just sit tight and the relationship will move along in its own time. Are you wondering about having your name on the mortgage because you’re feeling antsy about having your name on the property — for financial security reasons? If that’s the case, just focus on paying off your loan because that is a good first step in the right direction.

    Post # 8
    1137 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    View original reply
    @Scottish_lassie:  You just can’t call the bank and say “please put me on the mortgage”. You have to refinance the house, which costs several thousand dollars and is quite a hassel. I would probably just draw up an agreement between you and your Fiance so that you get some equity in the house because you are helping contribute to the mortgage.

    Depending on your state, once you are married your house may become community property anyways. Even if it doesn’t, whenever you sell the house and buy a new one together, the money from the sale and the new house will be 1/2 yours.


    Post # 9
    2554 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    It really depends what you’re comfortable with. My fiance and I bought a house 2.5 months into our relationship. I know that sounds nuts but it’s just the way it worked out for us and we were both completely comfortable with it. 

    Post # 12
    81 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: November 2013

    Whatever you do, DO NOT put your name on the mortgage without putting your name on the deed also.  The mortgage is just who is responsible to pay money back to the bank, the deed is who actually owns the house.  If you were to break up before being legally bound by marriage, you could end up being responsible to pay the bank for the mortgage (or risk messing up your credit score if you don’t pay) even though you have no right to the property as an owner!

    Post # 13
    18628 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2009

    You need to be on the title and the mortgage if you want to do this.  Never ever ever take a loan without having claim to the property that the loan is on.  Otherwise, if something happens, he could squat in the house while you pay the bils.

    Post # 14
    3942 posts
    Honey bee

    View original reply
    @Scottish_lassie:  Like a PP said, it’s a lot more complicated than just adding your name. There are steps involved and it doesn’t just happen overnight.

    You should do whatever you both feel comfortable with. My Fiance and I bought a home together before we were engaged. It works for us, but isn’t a good idea for everyone.

    The topic ‘Should I hold off going on the mortgage???’ is closed to new replies.

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