(Closed) Should I invite a coworker?

posted 5 years ago in Guests
Post # 2
277 posts
Helper bee

I don’t think she will take it to heart.  Weddings are expensive!  Does this co-worker know the other co-worker is a close family friend?  If you don’t hangout with her outside of work, and having just family and closest friends, I wouldn’t invite her.  It’s not that you don’t like her, but if you invite her, you’ll most likely have a +1 for her, and if other coworkers hear shes invited, they might feel left out. But this is just my opinion.  Hope this helps and good luck with your decision! 

Post # 4
7638 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

View original reply
goldengardenia:  There is no need to invite that other co-worker.

And you should have a word in private to the family friend. Explain that you are not inviting anyone else from work, and ask her not to talk about wedding details in front of other workers. She put you in a really awkward position, and needs to know not to do it again.

Post # 5
2668 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2016

As the first person is a family friend, I would not think that anyone else would be offended at not being invited. You had a relationship with them prior to becoming coworkers and have a relationship with them outside of work.

Post # 6
28 posts
  • Wedding: September 2016

I think it’s fine not to invite the other co-worker. You have a history with your family friend who now happens to be a co-worker, so it’s totally different. I don’t think your other co-worker would be offended, espeically if she knew that you were family friends that go way back. Maybe just don’t discuss it at the office anymore and tell your friend you’d like to keep it private. I agree with what the other bees said.

Post # 7
3607 posts
Sugar bee

View original reply
goldengardenia:  I wouldn’t invite the coworker, but I would ask the family friend not to bring your wedding up at work in order to avoid potentially awkward situations like this.

Post # 8
4092 posts
Honey bee

View original reply
goldengardenia:  my rule of thumb was to only invite coworkers that I socialized with outside of work. I also asked them not to mention it at work so people who weren’t invited wouldn’t get offended. I don’t think you should invite someone out of guilt. 

Post # 9
564 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2016

I’m trying to figure this out too. I have two close friends at work who will be invited, as I do socialize with them outside of work from time to time. I have a handful of other colleagues who I am very friendly with at work but inviting them would wreck havoc on my guest list so I’m not planning on doing it for now. But it’s still in the back of my head. 

My other question is my administrative assistant, who has been with me for years. She is very cash poor and I don’t want her to feel obligated to come or to get me a gift (both of which she will because im her boss). But I don’t want her to feel slighted either. I don’t socialize with her outside of with though so maybe she shouldn’t be on the list? I’m confused. 

In the meantime, there is no not discussing the wedding at work. I’m asked about it constantly. 

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