(Closed) Should I kick out my Bridesmaid?

posted 3 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 46
Member
2041 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

Normally I don’t reply to bridesmaids threads because all I can think is “bridezilla.” Looks like I’m right,but it’s the bridesmaid! OP, drop out of her wedding and disinvited her from yours. Seriously, this is nuts.

Post # 47
Member
958 posts
Busy bee

Stop wasting precious time and energy on this girl. And use the time and energy towards your wedding. She has already proved she is not worthy of your time or your friendship. 

Post # 48
Member
1072 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2017

your “Friend” has lost her mind. Cut your losses and bow out of everything, including the friendship.

Post # 49
Member
606 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

She now asked the bridal party to pay for food and alcohol? Wtf??? I hope they all drop her, this is absurd!

She is not a friend, OP. She’s a user and taking advantage of your generosity. Where is her Fiance in all this? How does he not know the debt she’s gone into? How is he ok with asking his groomsmen pay for the alcohol??

Post # 50
Member
1435 posts
Bumble bee

Wow, don’t just drop out of her wedding party, drop out of going at all and tell her she isn’t even welcome to attend yours much less be in your party. You gotta just end the friendship cold turkey and asap. This girl is disgusting. If I were you I would even do it on the group chat she started where she demanded people pay for food and drinks. F that! 

Please tell us you told her to get out of your life. 

Post # 51
Member
6354 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2016

Nooooooooo! 

Post # 52
Member
2333 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

Side note: where can I get a nannying job that pays that well? 

Post # 53
Member
14 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: December 2017

i don’t think she even considers you her friend now. instead of a friend, maybe she sees you as a walking ATM beacuse of all the financial support you have given her and now she just uses you. she took advantage of you. and let me tell you, she’s not worth it to be someone you consider close friend and even to be your bridesmaid. all the things she has done to you were spiteful and was only interested for her own gain. you’re literally her friend for benefit bee. you should really cut a toxic friend like her. i know i sound very judgemental, but after reading your post, it’s just not worth it. why spent money for someone who won’t bother to help you and somemore, asked you to pay for her honeymoon and things and threw a fit when you disapproved? does it even make sense? you really need to consider dropping her from being your bridesmaid

Post # 54
Member
10661 posts
Sugar Beekeeper

View original reply
sunberry928 :  

Quickly , like  NOW , right away    send her an email ( cc the other bms  too)  saying you  regret  you cannot accede to her latest request and that you  are taking the  opportunity to withdraw from  being a bm altogether and you imagine she wil be happy  to know that you no longer wish her to be a bm for you either .

You might wish to add that perhaps  you can  attend each others weddings  as guests …..

 

Do not delay!

Post # 55
Member
100 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

I don’t even understand. Who thinks like this? I felt guilty when people asked me what I wanted as a gift let alone demanding this sort of money. I have a feeling her wedding is not going to go smoothly…

Post # 56
Member
815 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I agree with others that this is a “friendship” that should end. A word of additional advice, though. You start out by saying you lent this woman money for a rental car and for groceries. Well-intentioned of course but this is where it started. Lending people money too often leads to problems. Save your money for your own emergencies, or maybe that of a close family member (even then be careful). At a time in my life when I had money troubles, someone referred me to a community program that provided some free groceries each month, and I looked into food stamps. 

Post # 57
Member
212 posts
Helper bee

To answer the heading question – Dear God Yes! She is not your friend and do you really want to see her in your wedding pictures after all the shit she’s pulled?

To the bit where she expects the bridesmaids to pay for her food, I think I would have personally laughed in her face. At this point, after everything you have said, I think any semblance of being polite would have gone out the window. I think my only reply to that would have been “hahaha. No.”

Drop her, and drop out of her wedding. Let her deal with her own mess, it’s not your problem. 

Post # 58
Member
2544 posts
Sugar bee

View original reply
sunberry928 :  We literally just got a text saying that the maids are in charge of paying for food and the groomsmen are in charge of paying for alcohol. One week out and they just push this on us 

That is INSANE. Perfect excuse to back out immediately.

Post # 59
Member
2544 posts
Sugar bee

 

(Double Posted)

Post # 60
Member
6547 posts
Bee Keeper

View original reply
sunberry928 :  Here’s your response to that:

“F#$ no we’re not paying for your wedding. Also we can’t attend and you’re out of mine. Do not call me again.”

If you continue accepting this charade of a friendship this is on you. You gotta say no. Quit being a doormat. This is really really bad. 

 

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