(Closed) Should I make tthe first!

posted 10 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
445 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2007

I think that’s a great way of trying to win them over! Someone who is clearly trying to make an effort and killing them with kindness is very difficult to dislike! You already have one thing in common, and that’s your FH. Good luck and I hope everything works out for you!

Post # 4
142 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

that does sound like a good idea! maybe they will love you instead of the ex!

Post # 5
1514 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

Good luck with that.  I think your ideas sound nice.  You could always do an intimate dinner or something too.

Post # 6
3979 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

I think the best approach is really to just "get in there" and try to be wiggle your way into the family. You said you went once & never really went back again… perhaps they see you as the cold, unfriendly one who is keeping your Fiance from them? (I’m not agreeing with that statement- just trying to figure out their POV)

Initially my Fiance family didn’t like our age difference, his mom kept calling me an ex gf’s name (her name started with a C, mine is with an R- so it wasn’t an accident) & his sister NEVER corrected her and scoffed instead. It was hurtful! We are a LD couple & everytime I’m there I invite his parents over for dinner & board games… so about every 2 months or so. It’s a nice way to bond & show them you love and can take care of their son, etc. 

I was at his parent’s for Mother’s Day & while we were waiting for his other siblings to arrive the four of us played board games. Now I’m closer with his parents than anyone else in his family & whenever we get together its marathon sessions… I mean, atleast 6-8 hours of time together. It’s a lot, but they appreciate it… Just weasle your way in there & remain sweet and helpful! Let them know you aren’t going anywhere by actually being there.

How can they dislike a wonderful, kind person?!

Post # 7
359 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

a geg is in order. Charm the socks off of them.

Post # 8
3331 posts
Sugar bee

I think it would be really nice and mature of you to "be the bigger person" and reach out to them.  It’s a lot harder to be stand-offish to someone who is being warm and kind to you.  Invite them over for dinner or offer to share some of their hobbies or interests. 

Post # 9
7052 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2010

I’d give it the best shot I could.  I remember being worried that my guy’s parents would still have this huge bit about missing his xw since they were married so long.  he had been divorced 2 years when we met.

Turns out I was wrong!  they never missed her at all! (I almost wish they did b/c it would make things much easier imho).

Just be bigger as the other bees suggested.  How close are you to his kids?  it seems the family thinks the kids really liked her?

Post # 10
1356 posts
Bumble bee

A sincere effort is always appreciated! Good luck!

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