(Closed) Should I offer to pay?

posted 8 years ago in Music
Post # 3
9056 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

If you’re friends with these people, and inviting them to the reception I would probably give them a thank you gift rather than straight up cash. 

Post # 4
19 posts
  • Wedding: May 2010

Acquaintances? I’d pay them. Or at least talk to them before hand and ask them what would be fair. Bring it up or else they may feel taken advantage of.

Post # 6
14 posts
  • Wedding: May 2011

I’m in a string quartet and I’ve played for several friends’ weddings; we said it wasn’t necessary, however they were always nice enough to offer a little gift. (ie: Starbuck’s card, $10 Visa giftcard, etc.) Do whatever suits your fancy, darling. Smile

Do be careful, though. When my sister got married, she invited the quartet to join them for the reception. At her particular venue, if one went over the headcount they submitted, they were charged an additional $50. And sadly, that’s what happened to my sister. But that may just be the particular venue she was at. I thought they were quite ridiculous to begin with though, lol.

Post # 7
1763 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

Wow, you are so lucky to have such talented friendors! I would bring it up and ask what they were expecting. If they say nothing then just give them each a small gift as a thank you. this post reminds me that I REALLy need to find some musicians for the ceremony!

Post # 9
2767 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

I would pay them.  I had my violin instructor play at my wedding and I paid her $175.  She had to spend a lot of her time practicing the songs.  It isn’t just the ceremony time that she devoted to our wedding.  

Post # 10
175 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I am in the same situation!

I feel uncomfortable asking them if they’d like to be paid, yet I also feel uncomfortable not paying them and just giving them a gift. (They will be attending the wedding as guests.)

If I give them a gift before the wedding, then they might perceive that as “payment” and not expect to be paid. However, what if they would prefer to be paid rather than receive a gift? So many scenarios, gosh…

Since they will be guests, I am completely not expecting them to bring a gift to the wedding and I hope they perform as a “gift”, but you never know, right?

Post # 11
1570 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 1996

I grew up surrounded by talented musicians and part of me wishes we were getting married back home so we could ring up a few of them to perform for us; I remember so many of them doing weddings and in my case a few Easter services. Yes you should offer them something, but not the full fee they’d normally expect since you have invited them to the reception. I think a gift or a gift card would be appropriate. Good that you’re asking your friend, too, though of course if she says not to give them anything, take that with a grain of salt as she might just be acting polite.

Post # 12
88 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

I have several acquaintances that will be helping with my wedding.  I have offered to pay, but within my budget.  This is how it broke down…

DJ – Offered $500 – Is doing it for free.

Photographer – Offered $400 for 3 hours – Is doing it for $100

I gave them both chances to take what they felt was reasonable. So I say offer to pay, but maybe have them give you a price they feel is reasonable… maybe give them a price range as well.

Post # 13
3344 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I would give them each a card with a cash prize inside.

Post # 14
804 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

I’d be paying them. My fella is a classical guitarist and he just played his best friend’s brothers wedding (he’s known the family forever) and they paid him. He turned down the full amount they offered and I know he felt a bit dodgey about taking the money but if you didn’t know these people you’d be paying an arm and a leg for them – musicians don’t come cheap!

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