(Closed) Should I replace a BM?

posted 8 years ago in Bridesmaids
  • poll: should I replace her?
    yes : (7 votes)
    64 %
    no : (4 votes)
    36 %
  • Post # 3
    54 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: August 2011

    Im so sorry!! I don’t even really know what to do. I think you may just need to have coffee with her and get everything out on the table, then decide from there. She may not want to be a bridesmaid anymore.


    Post # 4
    212 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: April 2011

    I think if you do ask her to step down, you have the possibility of losing her as a friend completely, so you have to consider that risk and evaluate if you would be okay with it.

    Has she already bought her dress?

    Post # 5
    263 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2011

    That might be a good idea- talk to her about things. That will help you make a decision either way. Honestly, you should probably find a way to replace her, because it sounds like this is bringing you down. You don’t want drama or discomfort where there need not be any.

    Post # 6
    171 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: April 2012

    I am in the same situation. I became friends with a girl I asked to be my bridesmaid not too long ago and now she has fallen out with me over some childish misunderstanding and refuses to mutually resolve it….

    i think i am going to have to ask her to step down too as even after I apologised and asked to meet for coffee to “clear the air” she was still not willing to let things go…. and the matter at hand is so ridiculous!!!

    how do you go about asking her to step down? by email? what if she doesn’t want to meet face to face or answer your calls?

    like we need this added stress on top of planning everything else!

    let me know what you do!!!

    Post # 7
    1690 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    i think if you ask her to stand down you will probably lose her as a friend,  but maybe you could ask her if she WANTS  to step down?  when she asks why you would ask that,  just tell her that you feel things are not really going the way you had hoped and wondered if it was because she didnt want to be a bridesmaid after all.

    if she steps down then all well and good,  if she insists she still wants to be a bridesmaid,  then maybe this will give her a bit of a nudge.  tell her you are upset at her complaining about things,  and what can you do to put it right? put the ball in her court…….this may open a can of worms,  but better now than later

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