- 6 years ago
- Wedding: November 2012
I am facing a small moral dilemma..
I am currently 6 mo pregnant and had planned to get married late next year, but with bubs on the way, me and my fiance finally decided we wanted to have a small immediate-family only church ceremony before the birth, and still have a big beach wedding and recepton next year as planned.
My fiance asked his older brother to be his only best man / witness for the small church wedding, and as my only sister lives overseas, I asked my best friend to be Maid/Matron of Honor / Witness (but we agreed no other friends to keep things small and simple while I’m pregnant.
In the meantime, this best friend (who has been engaged for 5 years) came into some money and decided to get married to her fiance… 5 days after my due date to have my baby. She said she had to pick this date because it was the only time available as her fiance works away and otherwise she felt like she would never do it. But that is crap; he has now decided that he has the money to move back after they get married. She asked me to be Maid/Matron of Honor along with another friend, but we all know that there is no way I will be Maid/Matron of Honor let alone at a wedding a couple of days after I have a baby.
She hasn’t done anything remotely Maid of Honour-y yet as this wedding is so small. The only thing I did ask was for her to organise a small hen’s dinner, but it was an absolute nightmare. She made it for the one day that I told her I was already busy (so I had to cancel what I was doing), and then she brought her 1.5 yr old daughter along and complained about her food being undercooked and didn’t end up eating or paying for anything.
She didn’t come to the wedding rehearsal because she was sick.
I told her she could pick out her own dress that she felt comfy in, and she got a bright red dress, because she wanted to wear it again.
To cut a long story short, I told my Sister about the wedding a month ago, and she decided to come home for the small church wedding.
I really just want to ask my sister to be my witness/MOH and uninvite my friend to both the wedding and bridal party for this year, because I feel bad for other friends I didn’t invite, and I am really resenting having her by my side as family with the way she has been acting. I feel so hurt by it all and don’t want to be thinking about it while saying my vows!
At the same time I don’t want to lose her friendship (we have known each other 15 years), and I feel bad that she bought a dress (albeit it is very casual and I would give her the money for it). The wedding is in a week and my Sister wants to be my Maid/Matron of Honor – what should I do (having both of them isn’t really an option because then my fiance would have to get picky with his friends at really short notice)??
Any suggestions on whether I should give her the sack and if so, etiquette of how to do it?