Post # 1
With my mum’s recent cancer recurrence, SO and I got into a big conversation about timelines about engagement and marriage. We are what I would consider pre-engaged, we’re committed to one another and want to get married but he wants to do the big surprise proposal too. He has told me that the proposal will definitely take place this year (refuses to define it anymore than that because he wants it to be a surprise) and we will get married next year. Bearing in mind that my mother being at our wedding is very important and we don’t yet know the success of her treatment, it may be that the wedding takes place earlier rather than later next year.
So what does this mean? NZ is very small, and the wedding shows take place in our Autumn (Fall) – both of them. It’s unlikely I will be engaged by the time they come around this year (17th April & 1st May) and I may be too far into planning (or even married!) by the time they come around next year. These shows are also where many vendors offer specials and being that we would like to keep costs down, that would be valuable.
So do I go? SO has no problem with it, says I should just pop a fake ring on and go for it. Mum says that I should go but keep it on the down-low just in case friends and family think I’m engaged. Cousin S (who will be my MOH) thinks I should go, her and her Darling Husband went together before he even proposed. I still feel a little bit weird about it, knowing that it makes good financial sense but feeling a bit sneaky at the same time. Would love to hear your views.
Post # 3
I think in your situation its perfectly ok to go. I prob wouldn’t put on a fake ring or anything. Anyone can go to bridal shows and ask vendors questions. When I went to one its not like they were staring at my finger trying to determine if I was engaged. I had friends with me not engaged that would go ask questions for me too.
Post # 4
I would go if that’s what you want to do. There is no reason not to, since you know you will be engaged in the future. You don’t have to bring tons of people (but you can if you want). Personally, I hate bridal shows… but it seems like the ones you’re going to actually have deals and will be worth it! 🙂
Post # 5
Thanks for your feedback guys… I don’t know that there is an easy answer here. Would love to hear more views.
Post # 6
The biggest problem with going is if your SO thinks it’s weird/pushy, but he is totally on board with it! Possibly take the Maid/Matron of Honor for moral support?
You’ll regret not going and if it turns out to be a dud you can always leave early but you’ll never know until you go.
Post # 7
I would go! There is absolutely nothing saying that you can’t… plus, like you said, you may not have the opportunity next year! My Fiance and I went to tour our first reception venue on Fri (super YAY) and my silly behind left my ring at home. I was soooo upset when I realized it halfway to the venue. But when we got there, it’s not like the lady who gave us the tour was looking at my hand for a ring.. LoL. They’re not going to know you’re not engaged. Lots of people get engaged without rings, anyway.
Post # 8
You reminded me… One of my friends is obsessed with cake, so she put on a fake ring one day to go wedding cake tasting. She didn’t make an appointment or anything, just went into the shop and asked some questions and they offered to let her taste the cake.
While I think her actions are a little questionable, I don’t think going to a bridal show (with or without a fake ring) is a problem at all. Actually, not wearing a ring might be better because maybe the vendors will be less aggressive. Go for it and have fun!
Post # 9
If your SO doesn’t have a problem with it- go!
Post # 10
We went to a couple shows before we got engaged and I personally think we shouldn’t have. First off, it’s a little depressing, being in a room full of brides, and when you talk to every vendor, the first question they ask is when the wedding is. It seemed like since we had given a date about 2 yrs away (that was a tentative date at the time), they didn’t really take interest in us as clients.
Also, now that I AM engaged, I stay far far away from bridal shows. Anyone who has ever gone to one knows the flood of spam that you receive in mail and through phone! It’s freakishly annoying!
If you want to go, then just go! But from my personal experience, it’s not worth the hassle and feeling sad that you don’t have a date/aren’t engaged yet. Definitely doesn’t help the waiting game AT ALL.
If you’re looking for deals, just barter with the vendors! My dress shop knocked $100 off my dress and gave me a free slip just by asking! Our ceremony venue knocked $400 by searching around and booking at the right time! There’s plenty of other ways to save money than going to bridal shows (and trust me the deals aren’t really worth it anyway!)