Post # 1
Future Sister-In-Law has been forbidden from seeing a particular guy (M) that she was involved with last year. In the early part of 2010, she was dating M, who is no good. He’s a drug dealer, in and out of jail, and he cheated on Future Sister-In-Law and got a girl pregnant. Future Sister-In-Law broke up with M after she got busted for dealing drugs with him and found out he’d gotten a girl pregnant. Well, recently, Future Sister-In-Law and her boyfriend (C) broke up. As soon as they broke up, she started messing around with M again, secretly. M is forbidden from entering Future Mother-In-Law and FFIL’s house. They’ve told FSIL that if he does, she will be out on her ass.
Okay, so I got up this morning and Future Sister-In-Law was in the kitchen making a snack, on the phone with her friend. She said, “Well, I’ve got M here with me, so I’ll have to take him home first.”
So, M is in FSIL’s bedroom right now. She snuck him in after Future Father-In-Law, Future Mother-In-Law, Fiance, and I went to bed last night. What I’m wondering is should I tell my Future Mother-In-Law or FFIL? I really don’t want to cause myself any drama with Future Sister-In-Law, but I feel like Future Mother-In-Law and Future Father-In-Law need to know that this criminal is in their home without their knowledge.
Honestly, I don’t even think it would matter if I did tell them. Future Mother-In-Law believes every lie my Future Sister-In-Law tells her and is so easily suckered in to every crazy scheme. If Future Father-In-Law finds out that M is in the house, he will want Future Sister-In-Law to leave and never come back. Future Mother-In-Law will defend her and say, “Oh, he was only in the house for a minute.” Because Future Sister-In-Law will make up some sob story, claiming that M did not spend the night here. Then, she will be mad at me for saying anything. I am so torn between doing the right thing and keeping things drama-free for me.
Post # 3
@Pinksapphire: This is a case where the bearer of bad tidings is the one who gets burned. I would see if there was any way to get Future Sister-In-Law to slip up herself in front of them. Perhaps have Future Father-In-Law go into the room for some reason?
Post # 4
@StormyRose: Agreed. no good can come from you telling, but if you can get him in there somehow, that would be your best bet
Post # 5
Just ask Future Mother-In-Law or Father-In-Law to go ask her something, she’s in her room… Nice and subtle.
Post # 6
This guy is a drug dealer who has been in and out of jail, and she has invited him into the home? Yeah, I would tell. She is not only behaving stupidly by involving herself with him, she is putting her safety and the safety of the rest of the family at risk by having him around. NOT OKAY, in my book.
Post # 7
Don’t say anything. If I were you, I would tell your Fiance & he can decide if he wishes to tell his parents or not.
Post # 8
I would tell Fiance and let him deal with it. If he says no then let it be. She can dig her own hole.
Side note: I can’t believe she’s disrespecting her parents like that. If my parents had told me I couldn’t have a guy over, I wouldn’t have a guy over. Duh! Common sense.
How old is she?
Post # 9
Definitely let your Fiance be the one to tell.
Post # 10
I’m with Lady Baker. Tell your Fiance and let him decide if his parents need to be told or not.
And same question – how old is she?
Post # 12
@Pinksapphire:Isn’t she like 20 or 21? If I were you I would most definitely tell Fiance and ask him to please say something. I would not be comfortable with someone like this being in my home.
Post # 13
@Pinksapphire: Tell them. I’ll write why I think so later, I’m busy watching the food.
Post # 14
Last year, FSIL’s involvement with M not only got herself into a lot of trouble, but also got Fiance into trouble just because he was at home when Future Sister-In-Law was dealing drugs. Some undercover cops came to the house to bust Future Sister-In-Law. Fiance did not know they were cops, nor did he know his sister was selling drugs from the home. He thought the guys were people trying to hurt his sister (he heard a lot of commotion and screaming coming from downstairs), so he pulled out a gun. They never identified themselves as police officers. They just kept telling Fiance to shut the f*ck up, then they arrested him. At that point, he realized he’d made a mistake, but it was too late.
All of that happened because Future Sister-In-Law was involved with M, and he was supplying her with drugs. Now, if something like that had happened in my mother’s home, she would have thrown my ass out! She would never let me return after having put everyone in her home in such a horrible position. But, Future Mother-In-Law is different. Her precious babies never can make a mistake, especially not perfect Future Sister-In-Law. After Future Sister-In-Law got Fiance in legal trouble, he was angry and vowed never to forgive Future Sister-In-Law. Future Mother-In-Law is constantly demanding that Fiance treat Future Sister-In-Law with respect. Wtf? She doesn’t deserve any respect. She certainly doesn’t respect Future Mother-In-Law, Future Father-In-Law, or FI!
I am really concerned for my safety being here alone with Future Sister-In-Law and M. I am concerned for Future Father-In-Law and FMIL’s property, as well. If I tell Fiance, and he tells his parents, Future Sister-In-Law will still know that I’m the one who blabbed.
I can almost guarantee that Future Sister-In-Law will actually tell on herself to her mother, but Future Mother-In-Law will just say, “Oh, (FSIL)! Don’t let your daddy find out if you bring him over!” Instead of, “Get the f out of my house! I can’t believe you’ve disrespected your father and I this way!” I need Future Father-In-Law to find out. He’s at work right now, and Future Sister-In-Law will be long gone with M by the time he gets home. I’m just hoping she somehow gets caught. But, I don’t think I’ll say anything.
Post # 15
She is 20 and very, very pathetic. She doesn’t pay for anything, doesn’t do anything around the house, and demands money from Future Mother-In-Law (when she lives here for free). She lies so much, I can’t even begin to explain all of the stories she tells. But, the thing is, I’m not used to such naiive parenting. My mother was always one step ahead of us kids. Not Future Mother-In-Law. She lives to be a doormat for Future Sister-In-Law.
Post # 16
Can’t you just tell your FFIL? Who cares if she knows you blabbed, if its putting everyone’s safety in jeopardy. This isn’t just a bad boyfriend they want to keep her away from. This guy is bad news, and could cause serious problems for the whole family.