Post # 1
Member
101 posts
Blushing bee
To give you some background on my situation-
I am 5’0″ and my fiance is 6’2″ so there’s always been quite a height difference between us. Although we don’t mind it and actually consider it cute that we’re not even close to the same height, our friends and some of my family still poke fun at it. Most of my life I’ve been harrassed for being so short and I’m tired of it, so when we started dating it just got worse. Mostly our friends would point out OBVIOUSLY how I am so short compared to him (oddly it was never ‘he’s so tall compared to me’). I know they weren’t trying to hurt my feelings but it gets annoying when I already know our obvious height difference and people keep repeating it. So I was thinking about when we are exchanging vows and saying our “I Do’s”, how are they going to react when they see us up there with a foot plus height difference between us? Will everyone be whispering to each other about how odd we look? I’m sure they will be polite and sit quietly through the ceremony, but I guess I am afraid of what they will think.
I thought about wearing tall heels during the ceremony so that while we’re in front of everyone, it won’t be so obvious that I’m incredibly short standing next to him. My only problem is…I CANT wear heels! I have terrible balance, not to mention weak ankles (I’ve had so many sprains in my life I can’t count them all). So naturally I never wear heels and if I have to wear them for an event, I practice wearing them for a week beforehand. I also have a fear of falling while walking down the isle…I don’t want to wear heels if I can help it, but I’ll have to give up the height if I don’t and risk falling or wobbling if I do (pathetic, right?).
My mother says I should be myself, wear flat shoes, and anyone who laughs or whispers should not have been invited to the ceremony anyway- but at the same time my Maid/Matron of Honor thinks I should wear the heels to create a sense of balance (oh, the irony). What should I do??
Post # 3
Member
670 posts
Busy bee
if you want to wear heels, start practicing now. get comfortable with them. that is what I’m doing. (I’m 5’2 as well.)
But honestly, don’t do it if it’s not you… do it because you want to!!!!!
Post # 5
Member
429 posts
Helper bee
@hisluckygirl22: Honey, wear the flats and screw the haters.
Are you going to be thinking, “I wonder if other people think I look short compared to Mr. LuckyGirl?” or will you be thinking “aldjsfaslfasf I love this man”?
If you honestly think you’ll be worrying about it, I agree with PP – look into wedges or other heels that provide a wider support base.
I just hate it when people are made to feel like somehow they’re responsible for things out of their control, especially when they’re jerks about it. I’d probably start reacting passive aggressively – a friend says I’m short compared to him? I answer “yes he is very tall compared to me.” Turn it right back around. Even if they don’t get it, it makes me feel better!
I may have personal vested interest in this topic… I’m 5’1″ and Fiance is 6’2″. But I looooooove heels, so this is the best advice I got!
Post # 6
Member
1222 posts
Bumble bee
@hisluckygirl22: Maybe you can compromise? I totally understand about not wanting to trip going down the aisle, so maybe wear a short heel? Or I’ve heard of some brides having a step to stand on during the ceremony. Maybe you could figure out a surreptitious way to slip something like that in? I don’t think you mentioned, but some churches/wedding venues have the front/alter raised slightly (as in, that entire side of the room/space is raised with one or two stairs). Maybe have him stand on a step lower than you if this is the case? (If your dress has a train it won’t be noticable).
Or, I totally agree with the poster above me- wear flats and tell the haters to buzz off!
Post # 8
Member
2497 posts
Buzzing bee
@hisluckygirl22: Like PP said, WEDGES! They require so much less balance, especially if you get a pair with a wide heel base. Also, having a platform front will make them feel less steep. I’m a heel girl so I’m definitely biased, but I really think you should heels one kind of heel to your ceremony. That way you can make eye contact more easily with your Fiance during your vows!
Post # 9
Member
1292 posts
Bumble bee
FLATS!!! Who cares what others think…they care way too much about how things will look – that’s just silly. You will always be short, he will always be tall. Your wedding photos will be the *real* you. The comfortable you!!
Stick with flats!
Post # 10
Hostess
7561 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
Wear flats and be comfortable! I think people just think it’s cute that you guys have a height difference, I’m sure no one thinks it actually looks strange.
