(Closed) Should Marriage be a Renewable Contract?

posted 6 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
6222 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2013 - The Liberty House

I don’t really like this idea. I am fine with making the decision once. If we really want to celebrate again we can have an anniversary party or a vow renewal.

It would suck to have to schedule my marriage renewal, like renewing my registration or my license. If I forget or am late on the paperwork, does that mean I’m not married anymore?

I also think that it would make divorce the default, since people could decide just not to renew, which is not really in line with vowing to stay with someone as long as you both shall live. I guess we could always alter the vows to be “for the next five years, at which point we will re-evaluate”

Post # 4
Member
11325 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2011

I think it sort of defeats the purpose of marriage. Marriage is SUPPOSED to be a huuuuuge life-long decision. Not a lease on a car. 

Post # 6
Member
10366 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

I mean, it kind of already is, in a non-technical sense. You can get out of it. I think making it something you have to actively renew would really mess with my sense of stability, though. I never want to have to wonder “Is this the renewal where he’ll have changed his mind, and not have told me?!”. Divorce typically gives a bit more warning!

Post # 8
Member
6222 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2013 - The Liberty House

@praline13:  But this is the reason why divorce is allowed. If you look at it just in terms of the contract and what’s allowed by law, the current vow would be ” I vow to love you until I change my mind”. Having it legally be a renewable contract won’t mean that religions will change their minds about no divorce. It will just mean more paperwork that people will ultimately be inconvenienced by if they do want to renew their marriage. There’s just no reason for it when you can back out of a marriage at any time, anyway.

Post # 9
Member
1606 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@praline13:  I think the reason we have a contract is BECAUSE you cannot vow to ‘love’ someone forever int he sense that movies and music portray love. It won’t be glitter and unicorns everyday. But it doesn’t mean you should give up and part ways – two people vowing to live and work together to create a family are what a marriage is about. (A family can be two people).

This contract is only to help ensure the promise. When you have this promise to work for – then you work at finding a new special love. A quiet appreciation for the other person and the things they do. This is how you make it to forever.

I think this could have terrible consequences on family life and the children of the next generations.

Post # 10
Member
4495 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Ugh, that would be kind of depressing. “I vow to love you for the next 5 years..” Maybe that would never be said in a ceremony but thats what it would be like! Marriage is already easy enough to get out of and people end them everyday. I think this would just encourage more people to get married on a whim or without being 100% sure because they know that if it doesn’t work they can just wait it out Undecided

Post # 11
Member
3885 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I genuinely do not have a problem with this. If you’re happy in your marriage, just renew. If you’re not happy, then the parties can split without the pain and trauma and expense of divorce. It’s really just a pre-nup taken one step further, in my book.  As long as you are not FORCED to separate at the end, then I don’t see the harm in it, and I actually think it would be very romantic to sit down with Darling Husband every 5 years and get all gooshy and romantic as we re-re-re-re-marry.

Post # 12
Member
13096 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2010

@CorgiTales:  “I think it sort of defeats the purpose of marriage. Marriage is SUPPOSED to be a huuuuuge life-long decision. Not a lease on a car.”

Agreed.  And besides, what a pain to have to go schedule renewing your marriage every few years for the rest of your life.  🙁

Post # 13
Member
8444 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

If marraige were a renewable contract, I’d probably just date.  I don’t see the point of spending tons of money to get re-married every few years.  Although this would be genius if it was put out there by the wedding industry.

Post # 14
Member
11325 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2011

@Mrs.KMM:  Agreed. I’m forever late renewing my car tags… I don’t need something else to renew lol. (On another note, I feel like I haven’t seen you around, or maybe I haven’t been around, but regardless its been a while– hi old friend!)

Post # 15
Member
13096 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2010

@CorgiTales:  Haha!  It was me.  Work was really busy for a while so I really wasn’t able to get on much.  Combine that with the holidays and I was definitely away for a while.  It’s good to be back!  🙂

Post # 16
Member
4272 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

No no no

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