Post # 1
Hello to everyone in the hive!
I was going to ask my two oldest friends to be co-maids of honor in my wedding. However, recently (in the past month) one of them got engaged and is now planning to marry a month (or less) before my wedding. Do you think it would be out of line to ask her to just be a bridesmaid even if she has the expectation of being a maid of honor? I just feel like it would be a lot of stress on her to handle the responsibilities of being my maid of honor when she will be planning her wedding, and I would feel wrong giving her the title if my other maid of honor was really the one doing all the work. What do you think?
Post # 3
I don’t think it’ll be worth the hard feels to ask your friend to "step down." Sure she may barely do any work, but she’s still one of your oldest friends. You might just pull the other aside and explain to her how you feel and that you really feel bad that she’s going to do the brunt of the work. And then do an extra-special thank you for her in private.
Post # 4
why dont you take her to lunch and talk to her?? or have a girls shopping day and talk to her?? i bet she’d appreciate the honesty!
titles are just that – titles… we’re all grown folks and have our own lives kwim? i dont ecpext either one of my MOHs to do the traditional duties -they have kids and lives of their own ya know??
Post # 5
Just ask her – tell her you want her to be your Maid/Matron of Honor, but if she feels like its too much stress/expensive/whatever, you want her to be honest and it won’t hurt your feelings either way. I said the same thing to one of my bridesmaids – I told her I knew she was really busy and had a lot going on, we would like her to be in it, but if she didn’t want to we completely understood.
Post # 6
ditto the other comments above…..
talk to her and see how she feels on the subject.
Post # 7
are you sure she’s not willing to do the work? you should talk to her.
my Maid/Matron of Honor is also getting married a month before me and i am also her Maid/Matron of Honor. it does sound a bit crazy but we’ve been able to use each other as a resource b/c we’re both in the same boat. also, we talked about it before agreeing to become each other’s Maid/Matron of Honor. we were ok with the workload, etc.