Post # 1
here’s the deal,
FH’s “biologcal guy” as he calls him, has never been in the picture, aside from his last name. FH thouht about legally changing his name before, but that was in high school when everyone called him by his last name and that was his identity. Now he wants no attachment to this guy and is concidering changing his last name. So we thought that our wedding day could be the official day that we both begin using a new name.
he’s still unsure if he should change his name at all. I need some advice bees
Post # 3
I think it’s a really cool idea, but y’all should both be 100% sure in this decision. It will be passed on to your children (if you have them) and become a huge part of your identity. I thought it would be fun to combine mine and SOs last name, but in reality we’re both too traditional for that. Do you have any ideas about names yet or is this just in the beginning stages? I would love to choose my own last name, but I have no idea what I would choose 🙂
Post # 4
If it’s a really big deal to him, now would be the perfect time to change it! 🙂 But I would be sure before you do so. I don’t see a problem with it… but it’s just such a big decision. On another note, I think it would be great for you both to change the last name and for him not to take your last name. It’s just my opinion though, I’m such a traditional lady! 🙂
Post # 5
My Fiance has considered the same thing actually. He has his mother’s last name and has felt pressured over the years to change his name to father’s. He also thinks that since I will be changing my name right now would be the best time for him to finally do it too.
Post # 6
I think that sounds like a great idea! What specifically are you looking for advice about?
Post # 7
I mean you guys have lots of options. He could change his last name to yours. You guys could combine your current names, or combine his mothers name with your name. Or you can take on a whole new name. I mean you should both sit down and discuss your options.
Post # 8
@mg1363: We’ve actually thought about taking on his mother’s maiden name. that family has been a huge part of his life, they are so wonderful. it would be an honor to hold that name.
@kperry3: I would never ask him to take my name. i love my name, i think it’s pretty! I am kind of excited to change my name, as a kid I hated the idea.
@DCMetroGirl: I agree with you. It’s a perfect time! Your beginning a new life together why not both begin it with a whole new name.
@sceeder: I like the idea of combining names but I don’t think anything really works. We’ve talked a little bit about it. I’m giving him the decision, I think it’s a bigger change for him than for me.
Post # 9
I think that’s perfect (taking his mother’s maiden name). Still a family name, but means much more to the both of you. I think that it’s a great idea.
Post # 10
I wish my Fiance would change his last name with me… of course he knows if he doesn’t I can’t take his because it’s too long =( oh well. But he did talk about changing his last name to his step fathers and I think it’s such a cool idea!
Post # 11
My dad is in exctly the same position your FH is. My dad’s mother passed away when he was a few months old and his ‘dad’ never wanted anything to do with him after that and was bought up by family. He has always used his biological father’s name however he had no tie or identy to this name and considered changing it to his mothers maiden name. However, he met my mum and they had me right after they got married and he didn’t want to have to give me a new name. To this day he wished he had of changed his last name when he was alot younger (18).
So, as I can relate to your story alot I think it is a great idea. I don’t like the idea of ‘creating’ a last name but taking his mothers maiden name is a really loevly gesture.
Post # 12
@SandAndSea: So you two wouldn’t consider taking your name? Dh actually took my name. It is a long story, but basically his Grandmother made up a last name at some point and so she and only DH’s Dad had it= Darling Husband has it and has no connection to it. It is a name associated with a different ethnicity and Darling Husband was constantly asked about it (he is very obviously NOT that ethnicity).
Dh wanted to take my German last name (we are both German). It was easy because you can freely change your name (either party) when you marry to the other party’s name. So, it didn’t cost anything and was pretty painless.
I think if you want to choose a new name, that would be fine. We thought about that as well- it just might be a little more of a headache. However, it is nice to have the same last name and it is a good time to do when you are starting your life together. We also thought about shortening mine, taking a maiden name etc.