(Closed) Should we TTC if we aren't 100% sure it's the right time?

posted 6 years ago in TTC
Post # 4
Member
188 posts
Blushing bee

@MissLilikoi:  I’ve been told by every mom I know there is never a right or convenient time if you both want a career. There are simply better or worse times and your kids will be fine in both.

Post # 5
Member
1401 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

In my opinion there’s never a right time to have a baby. You may never have enough money. Your job may never settle down. So many things that people think about before trying to have a baby. Darling Husband and I decided to just go for it. Some folks may find that irrisponsible but it was a choice that has worked for us. Our first is due in July and there’s been some bumps in the road but we’re excited regardless.

Post # 6
Member
3830 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

The right time is when you are in a loving relationship and you are both willing to make the sacrifices required to raise a child. 

Post # 7
Member
8041 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2013

@MissLilikoi:  I don’t think you’re ready just yet. I think it might be good for you to go to that foreign country and have the last hoorah as you say, then start the new job, and maybe when you’re six months to a year into the new job, TTC. So you’ll be 31-32 when you have the baby. That way you won’t have any job regrets, you’ll have your foot in the door at the new job, and you’ll be set up career-wise. I think the only con to that is that you might not be the most popular person if you’re only there a year before you take maternity leave, but what can you do? I assume you’re not running the company, so as long as there’s a position there when you get back, it’ll be fine. By that time you also may have a bit more urgency when it comes to acutally wanting a baby. It sounds like you want one but timing is quite off… I’d wait.

Post # 8
Member
2715 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Haha is anyone ever 100% ready to have a baby?  I’m sure there will always be one more thing you want to do or wait for.  As long as you are in a loving and stable relationship and can pay your bills, I think you’ll be okay.

But what does your husband think?  Is he ready to have a baby?  I think what I would do in your situation is not actively TTC but not actively try not to either.

 

 

Post # 9
Member
1202 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

@MissLilikoi:  I don’t ever think there is the perfect time to have a baby. If you and your husband are financially sound and ready for a baby emotionally, mentally, and financially I say go for it! And there is nothing wrong with having babies before you are 30. I am 32 and will be 33 when I get married in August. I wish I would have gotten married younger and had kids when I was still in my 20’s. All I know is that my Fiance and I won’t be waiting too long after we are married to start trying for babies. Good luck and I think it will come down to priorities for you and your husband. 🙂 

Post # 10
Member
4803 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I personally am glad that I am TTC now even though there was no 100% perfect time.  Right now I am 7 months in and am not yet pregnant, so it doesn’t always happen super quickly.  If I had made a specific plan, like “I will graduate from school in 3 months, then I want to travel for a year, then I will get pregnant and have a baby before my 30th birthday”, it might not work out like that.  What if it took over a year to get pregnant?  Would you start getting worried about your age?  Because I probably would (I’m 28 too).  So I decided to just start and if it happened right away it might not be 100% ideal, but it would be totally doable and we would still be happy/mostly ready.  But it didn’t, so I’m glad I found that out now and didn’t wait until later to start trying.

Hope that makes sense, it’s a bit rambling!

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