i really wished i could have paid for my girls dresses, but honestly if i did, i would not have been able to ask everyone i wanted to be a Bridesmaid or Best Man. and that would also suck. i just couldnt afford six dresses. also, all my girls expected to pay for their dresses since all of us, myself included, have been BMs in other weddings and always paid for our own dresses. despite this, i really wished i had money to buy them.
since i didn’t, i did the best i could to be fair. i told them i only cared about the color being the same, so i gave them a designer and color. one Bridesmaid or Best Man couldn’t find the designer where she was from so i found her another matching one. i wanted to give them a choice of designers too but i found it would just make things too complicated for them if they had all these different designers and color names that vary by designer to remember. i also limited my choices to ones that were available on netbride.com so it could be as cheap as possible for them.
i finally told them since all i care about is color, they were free to choose style, fabric, length, whatever they wanted. i wanted them to at least like the dress they were paying for and possibly wear it again. although i don’t think they will because of the color, lol, no matter what, the pale color makes it look like a “BM” dress.
ironically 4 of 6 of them chose almost identical dresses! all different style numbers, but very similar! in hindsight, i probably could have asked them to agree on one same dress, but oh well.
i also told them i *preferred* silver shoes and i recommended flat shoes for the beach – but ultimately it was up to them, they were in no way required to buy new shoes – like if they already owned silver flats or low heels, then i would hope they would wear those! for jewelry, i bought stuff for them to wear and was hopeful they like it enough to wear it again since it was part of their gift (part, not all!). Finally, i did not require them to get hair and makeup done since i couldnt afford it, but in the end, all but one wanted to. so i was quite happy.
i feel i did the best i could to not incur too much expense. and actually out of my 6 girls, i did buy one of them their dress – she is DHs teen niece and we knew she or her mom could not afford it. and the other Bridesmaid or Best Man overseas couldn’t order from netbride.com, so i offered her $100 so what she paid matched what everyone was paying.