Post # 1
In lieu of favors, we are going to make a donation to the Wounded Warrior Project. Fiance is a disabled vet and a bunch of our guests were/are in the service. I want to do a card that says something like “in lieu of favors a donation has been made in your honor…” but I am not sure what to write? Also where does this card go? We aren’t doing any favors at all, so I am thinking one card at each table? I’d prefer not to do a card at each place setting. Or maybe on the table with everyones seating cards I could have something that mentions the donation? Curious what other people did, thanks!
Post # 3
Instead of making cards for everyone, we put one in a frame by the guestbook, and then framed them behind the menus so there was one on each table, as well.
We wrote something like, In lieu of favors a donation is being made to the Rhuematoid Arthritis Foundation. Then we wrote a few sentences about what rheumatoid arthritis was, thanked people for coming, and at the bottom was a web address for more information.
Post # 4
There is is similar to the info side.. The purple is the donation side. Were doing those. One side of our place card is going to be the seating info.. The backside is going to be the donation notice. We ordered thru vista print. I will print or calligraphy the seating info once we get rsvps.
We also made this sign for the table. $3.99 on Vista print. So far only cost me $12.00.. Maybe another $10-15 for the seating.
Post # 6
I would remove in your honour. Not everyone wants a donation in their honour. This is a charity close to your hearts, but probably not every guests.
Also it’s in your honour, as you are the one getting the tax benefits.
Post # 7
@andielovesj: Yeah – this is not a good idea. People may not want to donate to a particular charity or have their name attached to it in any way – for any number of reasons.
Here’s the big thing though – calling this a “favor” is just a way for you to show off your own donation. Do I care that you’re donating to a cause you support? No, I don’t. And I don’t want you dragging me into it. If you want to donate a certain amount, then just donate it! Why do you have to put a card on my dinner table bragging about it? It has nothing to do with your wedding.
Post # 8
@oneofthesethings: Also, why is it never we cut the flowers and donated, or we downgraded the wedding bands and donated? It’s always the guest favour that is cut. And while I don’t want your home made chocolates either, it’s the thing that is to thank the guest that is cut.
I think people are often blind with loyalty to their own charities to see that other people may not feel as pumped about it as they do. Even ones that you think couldn’t possibly offend anyone. The Cancer Society. Who likes cancer right? Well there are lots of people who think they spend too much money on research and not enough on helping people with cancer. People who think they don’t spend their money “well enough” etc. So you never know.
Post # 9
@andielovesj: Yes exactly. You never know why someone may have an issue with a certain charity. Just donate the money if you want to, but leave it out of your wedding!
We didn’t do favors at our wedding, because frankly I think they’re stupid and wasteful. We donate to causes we support, but I didn’t feel the need to crow about it at our reception.
Post # 10
My family has lost a lot of people to cancer, so my cousin donated to the ACS for their wedding, had almost the exact same card as @DDG84:. There was a card at each place setting, and they were color coded (pink for breast cancer, teal for ovarian), all reflecting the type of cancer that had claimed one of our family members. I thought it was very touching, given our family history. I was much happier to have the card than some random plastic tchotchke.
The Wounded Warrior Project does amazing things, the company I work for actively donates a part of their proceeds on certain items to them. Since I have multiple friends and family that are/were in the service, I’d be honored to have a card showing a donation to them instead of a favor.
Post # 11
@HeLovesDogs: I agree with PP that it’s never a good idea to say “in lieu of favors” or “in your honor” when it comes to making a donation.
Here’s how I would do it instead:
“To celebrate our wedding day, we are donating to a cause close to our hearts: the Wounded Warrier Project. WWP provides programs and services to severely injured service members during their transition to active duty to civilian life. Our wedding day would not be complete without raising awareness for this worthy cause. For more information or to learn how you can get involved, scan this QR code or visit http://www.woundedwarriorproject.org.”
I just love what Wounded Warrior does for our servicemembers and wanted to give you a big thumbs up for contributing to them as part of your wedding celebration!
Post # 12
I don’t understand why some people get all bent out of shape about donation favors …I would much rather see money go towards a good cause then something that people will most likely throw out that night or the next day. I spent a long time trying to come up with favors that people would hopefully appreciate for our engagement party and who knows what people did with them…at least with this its going to a good cause to people in need. We decided to donate for our wedding after this.
I agree with not doing the “donation in your name”, but I also think it should be known that the reason people aren’t walking away with a favor is because the couple decided to donate the money instead. They could have very well not given a favor nor a donation and cheaped out all together.
It’s not about bragging, tax benefits, its about doing a nice deed for those in need. We’re paying for your plate, you can do without another trinket…
Post # 13
I have a tiny prob with the donation favors too- when I found out that a couple I know of only donated like $25 to the charity (on an easy 25k wedding)… that’s just lame… donate because it’s important to you, not just to “skip out of” favors or to brag about it.
Post # 14
- Wedding: September 2013 - Creek club at ion, SC
I too am donating favor money to the ACS. We decided on a bowl by the guestbook where people can take wristbands that well get in return from donating. We turned the sweet table into favors too.
Post # 15
I know you didn’t ask, but I wouldn’t recommend this as it could offend some guests (no matter what the charity is). A donation to a charity of your choice is really a gift for you, not your guest, so putting them in the middle like that can be resented.
Don’t get me wrong, i love it when people donate to one of my favorite charities which they know I’m all about (I have between 5-10 specific, lesser-known charities I see as “my causes”) as a birthday gift to me or something, but that’s when its the charity I choose. I wouldn’t donate to one of mine as a gift to someone else who isn’t as passionate about them as I am, even though i think few people hate those charities. It’s just not THEIR chosen charities, that’s all.
I recommend you absolutely do donate to your chosen charity but not tell the guests about it, and particularly don’t tell them it’s on their behalf.
Post # 16
Have you contacted the charity directly? Many charities do have some kind of pre-made item for this sort of thing, or can help make one for you. If it comes directly from the charity, it will be more legit and your guests will know that you actually gave money.