(Closed) shower

posted 5 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 2
Member
30393 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

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angel01535 :  What does that mean? Are you asking people for cash?

Post # 3
Member
911 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2016

You don’t. Just don’t have a registry and lots of people will inevitably end up giving cash.

Post # 4
Member
30393 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

 

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Jessi2883 :  for a shower? I understand the rationale of having no registry or a limited registry if you want cash for wedding gifts.

Post # 5
Member
215 posts
Helper bee

I agree with PP. Just don’t have a registry. But another question I have is why have a shower at all? Would it be a reunion sort of thing? Guests will give money at the wedding… I guess I don’t see the point of the “shower,” bee.

Post # 6
Member
851 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

Shower is for gifts.. if you dont need any physical gifts don’t have a shower.

Post # 7
Member
911 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2016

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julies1949 :  I agree, it would be preferable to not have a shower…. but where I live, no one brings gifts to weddings anyway (just cash) so if you really wanted a shower/family get together for the bride, then having no registry would signal a cash gift for that event too. Although some people would definitely just pick out a gift to bring so you have to consider that too!

Post # 8
Member
713 posts
Busy bee

We should probably keep in mind that this might be a shower that OP is was asked to host for someone else, not for herself, in which case she might have little input in the type of gifts to be given. OP, if you don’t put anything about where the couple is registered on the invitation, I would assume that people would either give cash or get in touch with you for clarification.

Post # 9
Member
15 posts
Newbee

Don’t they call that a wishing well? 

Post # 10
Member
681 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2019

I honestly find money showers a bit brutal. I have been invited to a couple that said ‘monetary gifts are appreciated’ with no registry and it rubbed me the wrong way. I am all for not registering for the wedding, but for a shower I feel like if you don’t need anything else, make it a theme shower (stock the wine cellar, give an ‘experience’ gift for the couple to use together, etc.) or just say no gifts please.

Post # 11
Member
5985 posts
Bee Keeper

I would not have one if you’re looking just for money.  People may still bring gifts instead of cash anyway and if you really just want cash then it’ll be awkward to have it and get gifts when it’s clear you want cash.

Post # 12
Member
356 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2017

Echoing “Shower is for gifts.” If I was invited to a shower and couldn’t find a registry, I’d buy a set of champagne flutes or something, not give money.

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