- 4 years ago
- Wedding: July 2014
We are getting married in November. I really, really hate being the center of attention and wanted to just elope but my fiance wanted to have a big wedding so that’s what we are going to do. I am warming up to it as we are planning but I’m still really struggling with the attention. I’ve had three people ask me about showers already. The concept of a shower is weird to me. If we’re inviting everyone to the wedding- what’s the point of a shower? I don’t want people to buy us a shower gift and a wedding gift. I don’t want anyone to go to all of that effort and spend a bunch of money on throwing us a shower. It’s just not necessary!
Then I think about who I would even invite. You watch movies and see pictures and it’s a bridal shower with all of these girlfriends and grandmas and moms. My fiance and I both lost our moms recently (mine just 4months ago), and we only have one grandma. I have like 5 girlfriends that I would want to be there and that’s it! Also, everyone lives like 6+ hours away. I’d never want for them to travel for a wedding AND a shower.
I know that some of this anxiety is realted to my mom passing away- I don’t even really want my sister to go dress shopping with me but I know it would hurt her feelings and she wants to go. I don’t even want to think about a bachelorette party- I told her that I would be okay with doing a spa day and dinner with my bridesmaids. That’s more me anyway, I’m not a partier. I would absolutely die of embarassment if I had to wear a plastic penis necklace and dance on a bar.
Someone tell me something.
Edited to add:
I don’t want to sound ungrateful. I am very flattered that I have people offering to host showers for us…I just hate feeling like people are going out of their way to do all of these things for us, making a big deal out of it, etc.