(Closed) Shower guest list help

posted 5 years ago in Parties
Post # 3
7649 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

@Little_Nut88:  First, if your Mother-In-Law wants to throw you a shower she will, but don’t ask her. Just plan on having a shower from your mom and sister. Invite who you want to invite to each event, and your suggestion sounded good. If FI’s family would get along best with your dad’s side then invite them to that one.

As far as your counsins’ girlfriends…if you truly want them there because you like them then invite them. They will not see it as gift grabby. Asking for a shower from Mother-In-Law and inviting everyone to all 2 or 3 showers would look gift grabby, and you aren’t doing that so you will be fine.

Post # 4
8827 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

 i invited the relatives from my FI’s side that i wanted there.

i doubt they would throw me a shower, but i knew they would want to be included.


the point of a shower is the “shower” the new bride with gifts for her new home.  don’t worry about feeling gift grabby.

i would extend the invitation to all showers to your bridal party.  stress that they don’t have to attend and don’t have to bring a gift.  but you would like their support when you attend the other family showers.



Post # 5
170 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

You are right not to ask your future in-laws about throwing a shower for you. I think you should just invite them to the shower you think they will enjoy the most. No need for explanations.

As for the cousins’ girlfriends- I agree with PPs who said you should invite them if you really want to. They won’t think you’re being greedy! They will just be excited to be invited! Smile

Post # 6
11233 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

Sigh, we had this same issue. His parents are divorced and the very first person to offer to throw me a shower was FI’s stepmom. My grandma offered a few weeks back, so I told them to combine the two–my side and FFIL’s side. My Future Mother-In-Law finally mentioned something about a shower when her sister and mom came down and decided to do a mini shower. I thought she might want to throw me one for her side, but she doesn’t really think of these things, I guess, and just asked if I was having one. I said FSMIL was throwing one and she was like, “Guess not!” and gave us some of her gifts then.

Your plan sounds fine. I would just mention to your Future Mother-In-Law what date that shower is looking to be on and that she and Future Sister-In-Law should look out for invitations or something like that.

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