(Closed) Showing Love For Those That DO Want Kids At Their Wedding!

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
5921 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: December 2010

We are inviting children to our wedding.  Growing up, Fiance and I both always loved weddings.  They were so exciting.  We have a lot of children in our families, and a lot of guests traveling hundreds of miles to share our special day.  I can’t imagine asking them to leave their child behind.

That’s just us though!

Post # 4
396 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

We will definatly have kids at our wedding. I’m like you; I just can’t see them not being there. They are all such a huge part in our lives. We love kids & are planning to try to concieve shortly after our wedding. I’m sure there are many couples invited to our wedding who will not bring their children because they want to enjoy a night out alone; which is totally awesome too! But for our Close family; I know they will all be there! I can’t wait!

Post # 5
1556 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I’m definitely having kids at my wedding.  First of all, I HAVE kids and it is important to me that they be there.  However, even if I didn’t have children, I would want everyone in my family to be there to share in the celebration.  I also don’t want to add to the expense of family members who would have to get a sitter for the evening.  And I know a lot of my older relatives LOVE the chance to see all the little ones together and all dressed up.

But mostly, I think the reason I’ve never considere excluding children from my wedding is that a wedding is a merging of two families…and the children are part of those families.

On the other hand, I totally get why people don’t want children at weddings.  As a parent, I love the occasional adult-only event…you can relax and enjoy the occasion better without worrying about keeping a preschooler occupied.

Post # 6
1084 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

We had kids at our wedding and it was nice.  I can see why, depending on the venue, you might not want kids, but it worked for us to have them and it made it more of a family affair, which I really love that kind of atmosphere.  They had fun dancing and playing together.  A lot of our friends and cousins are new parents and had to travel to go to the wedding, so it made sense instead of trying to find a lot of out of town babysitters.  Honestly, our wedding went for about ten hours, and the kids were probably all gone by eight hours but there were no problems. 

Post # 7
4765 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2011 - Vintage Villas

We’ll have kids at our wedding! We can’t imagine not having them there! Our nieces/nephews are such a huge part of our lives, and it would be so depressing if they couldn’t come! 

Post # 8
304 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

My Fi’s neices are 9 and 12, (love them to DEATH) and a close friend of ours has two small ones as well. They will pretty much be the only kids at our wedding… but only because noone we know has children!! We are so far apart in age that my friends don’t have any and his friends have either grown children or are using this as a getaway as a couple…

Post # 9
340 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

We are having children as well. I never had an opinion either way – but since the majority of our guests will be traveling in from out of town, I felt it unfair to not invite their children. Right now, there are 33 children on the list – but my guess is there will only be 10-15 children total that actually come. I’m not worried about any of the children being unruly or disrespectful, as I know their families and know that they children are well behaved. I guess if there were “problem” children I may not feel the same way?

Post # 10
1135 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2009

YAY for this thread!  You may have seen my comment on another thread about my hurt feelings when other people suggested that the presence of kids at weddings was akin to disaster–I just can’t imagine my wedding without them!  To me, my wedding is about our families coming together, and my family very much includes my little nephews (only boys so far! we need us some girls!) and little cousins.  They bring such joy with them everywhere they go and they make me laugh every day, I love them to pieces!  Each person who tells me they’ll be bring their child or baby (even better, I LOVE babies!) is giving me a little gift!  I can’t wait to be surrounded by my family of all ages!

Post # 11
4385 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

We will have children at our wedding! My Fiance cousins are older and have children, 4 in total. And my sister just had a baby girl a couple of months a go! Other than that, no one we know has kids, but those 5 will definitely be invited! Can’t wait to see them all dressed up!!

Post # 12
1016 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

Same here – my niece (flower girl and 6 years old) and my nephews (ring bearer – 7 years old and potential ring bearer 2.5 years old) are my JOYS.  I cannot wait to share the day with them – to have them in the limos with the grown ups in the bridal party, to have photos taken with them, to dance with them.  I couldn’t imagine my day without them.  My sister (their mom) is worried about the littlest monkey making a fuss at the church but honestly, I don’t mind if he does!  I’d rather have him there and try to include him than to leave him at home and not even try to have him walk down the aisle with his brother and sister.  They are way too important to leave out.  I have also told my best friend (bridesmaid) to bring her new baby if it makes life easier for her – I don’t mind having little ones there at all.  That being said I’m not inviting my cousins’ kids – most of them are pretty big now (h.s., college) but the real reason is that if I did there would be approximately 50-60 more people at the wedding!

Post # 13
806 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

We’ll have a handful of kids at our wedding (all relatives, and under age 5 or so).  I prefer to be inclusive since they ARE a part of the family and I see the wedding as a special family event more so than a grown-uppy fancy party. 

Also, if I were a parent, I think I’d appreciate being given the option to bring my kids to a wedding (even though I might decide to leave them w/ a sitter so I could really party).

I do have some minor anxiety that they will cry during the ceremony or poke their fingers in the wedding cake, but oh well… it wouldn’t be the end of the world.


Post # 14
745 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

we are having some children – neices, nephews, cousins, anyone that’s a relative but we aren’t having our friends’ kids come.  I love them all to bits, but I want our friends to enjoy a night out.

Post # 15
34 posts

Definately having kids at my wedding (so glad to see this thread). It is about two families merging and that includes the children.  I have a large number of out-of-town guest coming and ALOT of them have children.  I couldn’t imagine telling them, please don’t come if you have to bring your kid 🙁  Or telling my 6yr old daughter (who is a flowergirl) she can’t be there.

No Way!!

Post # 16
235 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

Originally, my Fiance and I did not want to have children at the wedding. ONLY because, when both of us were growing up (with strong German and English backgrounds), we never attended weddings with our families until we were in our teens, because our families just didn’t believe that a wedding was a place for kids. We’d also heard lots of horror stories about what goes wrong when kids are at a wedding. So for those two reasons, combined with our open bar and wanting parents to have the chance to enjoy themselves, we thought that we would have an Adult’s Only wedding.

I should also mention that my Fiance and I have a young son together. We intended on having him share the ceremony with us, but he was not going to attend the reception.

Then, the three of us attended a wedding last September, kids welcome, and we both loved it. It definitely added something to the wedding atmosphere to have the children making little speeches, and boogeying on the dance floor. After that we decided that we definitely wanted the youngest generation in our family to attend our big day.

(And I should also add that after we came to this decision, it popped up that we needed a minimum number of guests for the reception hall that we really wanted, so having kids there is cheaper at $30.00 a plate than inviting a bunch more adults at $110.00 a plate. So it made financial sense as well.)

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