Showing off or motivational?

posted 1 month ago in The Lounge
Post # 2
Member
737 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2018 - UK

I wouldn’t find this motivational, I’d find it irritating and frankly a little boring – why would I care how many calories someone else had burned? I don’t think she’s necessarily showing off, it could just be that she’s proud of herself and wants to share it with you, but it depends if she’s normally a competitive person.

My best friend is a runner, and she’ll often post online about her personal bests, but it’s usually because she feels a sense of achievement and wants to share it. If I was getting a text about it every morning though, it’d get old pretty quick. I’d probably stop responding to those particular texts, or maybe respond with a total subject change. Hopefully she’ll take the hint…

Post # 3
Member
231 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

Is she sending it to you specifically? It just sounds totally bizarre to me and I would absolutely not find it motivational. The only reason I track runs is to see how far I’ve come, not to send my stats to all and sundry. 

Honestly it would make me want to disable notifications from her :-/ 

Post # 4
Member
8055 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

lakebee :  just ask her to stop. My best friend and I use to do this when we were trying to get in shape and it was more to keep us honest. If I didn’t send her the final display of my morning treadmill she’d call me out that I skipped. BUT we agreed ahead of time to keep tabs on each other and we were both fully aware that she was in better shape than I was. We pushed each other but didn’t compete. 

Post # 6
Member
5693 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: July 2018

Since you also run she probably just thinks this is a shared interest and it is a way to keep in touch with you, plus it probably gives her motivation if she sends it to someone. 

I might not be malicious or showing off.  

Post # 7
Hostess
8670 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: Dorset, UK

lakebee :  Yeah I wouldn’t find this super motivational at all, quite annoying probably.  I would say, whilst you are super proud of her and are happy she is enjoying her running, you find it quite demoralising. 

Post # 8
Member
9926 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: City, State

Sometimes my friend tells me what she’s eaten or done exercise wise so that I will hold her accountable. 

Post # 9
Member
975 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2019 - City, State

I have done, and continue to send these out on snapchat. Not every time, but when it’s particularly hard to get out there. It is for my benefit, and others have literally told me it helped them get out the door themselves. She probably sends it to multiple people on her friends list, not just you. If it bothers you, tell her to stop. 

Post # 10
Member
3578 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2016 - Manhattan, NY

zzar45 :  I agree, she might think that she and the OP are accountability buddies. 

lakebee :  I’m inclined to think that there’s nothing malicious behind what your friend is doing, but a simple message could clear this up.  I have the kind of relationship with my friends where I could say, “Nice run, I feel like such a bum compared to you,” and we’d laugh about it and it wouldn’t be a thing. 

Post # 11
Member
5693 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: July 2018

Also I don’t know about everyone else but sending a photo or video on snapchat seems way less personal and less serious than actually texting you a photo of her run every day.  She is probably including all her friends who are vaguely interested in running or exercise.  

Post # 13
Member
5693 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: July 2018

lakebee :  I would just lightheartedly bring it up and tell her you aren’t really interested.  You aren’t wrong for not wanting to see when she goes on a run, but she isn’t wrong for sending it to you and she isn’t a mind reader so she has no idea this is actually bothering you. 

Post # 14
Member
465 posts
Helper bee

Anyone sending me anything daily would end up smothered in their sleep.  It may not be malicious, but it’s freaking annoying.

Post # 15
Member
2113 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2019

I have a friend that does this as well and it is really motivating for her, and it keeps her accountable. Honestly, it helps me get a workout in as well, but I am also competitive myself, so if she does something, I want to do something, too. I wouldn’t worry about it. You can ask her to stop but instead of letting it demotivate you, why don’t you flip it and try to let it motivate you? Send one back and say “not quite to where you are, but I’m catching up!”

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