(Closed) Sick and tired off it all !!

posted 7 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Hostess
18643 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

I would be very upset if I were you.  I would sit him down and tell him that you two need to have at least one evening together if not an entire day together.  You don’t always have to go out for dinner and a movie, you could do something that involves hobbies that one of you has or try new things together.

I applaud you for being a stay at home mom, I don’t think I could ever do that.

Post # 4
Member
1325 posts
Bumble bee

Of course you have the right to be upset!

I personally don’t do well with being cooped up in a house every day. I couldn’t do the stay at home mom thing. You need to get out more and you need to connect with other humans besides your kids. For instance, other moms! Find the hot spot in your area for moms to hang out and do things like discuss family, crafts, books they’ve read etc etc.

You also need to sit your husband down and tell him you need more romance for the two of you. Set up date night without anyone else there. Start with once a month if that’s possible. Write it down on the calendar and have him make reservations. He may be reluctant if a little bit of the fire has died down between you, but entice him with charm, your good looks, etc and use your feminine wiles to make him eager to go out with you. 

 

OH! and make sure and flirt with him when you go out!

Post # 5
Member
6892 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2012

I totally agree with @Tunacupcakes: and her advice. He needs to respect what you do just as much as you respect what he does. Maybe he doesn’t understand how isolating it can feel to be at home 24/7 with only children really to interact with most of the time. I definitely think you two need to ahve a serious heart-to-heart but you need to do it when you’re calmer and can be more clear with your points, rather than emotional. If you’re emotional, he’ll probably just discount a lot of what you’re saying as “hormones” or some bs. I definitely would be upset in your position.

Post # 6
Member
61 posts
Worker bee

Hold it.  Look at your own behavior for a second, OP.  It’s unpleasant to spend time with a person who ‘bitches so much’.  Sure you’re frustrated but being unpleasant about it is not going to make your husband want to spend more time with you.  Inviting his brother along to dinner is evidence of his own frustration. 

Try talking to him about your feelings instead of complaining about the situation.

Post # 8
Hostess
18643 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

If you don’t think he wants to be alone with you, I think the two of you need to consider counseling.  It isn’t going to be a good environment for your kids if the two of you can’t even be alone together.

Post # 9
Member
2271 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

I do believe it is time to leave the kids with HIM and go out for a nite with the girls!

Post # 10
Member
10367 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

@juliesprague: Are you explaining why you feel the way you do, instead of just cmplaining about his actions? Because I think most guys, if they understand the why of our feelings, totally get it. It’s just when we complain and expect them to be able to connect the dots on their own that things go astray (most of the time),

Post # 11
Member
2548 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I’m sorry you’re going through that, it must be tough. I just wanted to say I think you are a remarkable woman to be taking care of 5 children, a husband, and a home. Please try and find the time to take care of yourself too. I hope you can sit yur husband down and tell him your frustrations, and how you are really feeling. Goodluck!

Post # 15
Member
1325 posts
Bumble bee

Oi. I’m going to suggest counseling!

This seems to be a multifaceted problem that could use the help of someone who is a professional.

The topic ‘Sick and tired off it all !!’ is closed to new replies.

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