(Closed) sigh. SIL drama- sorry, long.

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
2641 posts
Sugar bee

OH man!  Well if getting away from the family isn’t an option, the only thing that kept running through my head is, can you move to someplace more affordable?  If Mother-In-Law is going to live with you regardless, can you just say “we’re moving to ____?”

I’m sure it’s not feasible in this market to just quit.  But are you both in a line of work you can look for work in a more affordable city/state?  Then you can buy a home with a little more space?  And perhaps SIL would just drop out of the picture?

Sorry I don’t have better advice….

Post # 4
2513 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2009

Wow! Well…. I don’t really know what to say or have much to contribute, but I just want to say you are a much stronger woman than I to be living as a newlywed with 2 other people! I think the differences between cultures is SO fascinating! I mean…it’s GOOD in a way, that you will be living with your Mother-In-Law because that means she won’t be on her own as she gets older, but at the same time I’m like HOW do you DO that especially in a 2 bedroom apartment?! 🙂

Anyways, that was off-topic so I’ll comment on the real issue at hand. His sister sounds like she is over-reacting a tad. If she seriously doesn’t use the stuff in that room, there is no reason why it can’t be relocated to the front room especially if there is extra space for it. She should be a little more understanding about that! Does she have a primary residence somewhere else? If so, why doesn’t she just take ALL of her stuff over there? I guess maybe she wants to still feel like she has a ‘home’ away from home or something?

At any rate, I hope you get it all worked out. It stinks that you can’t really talk to your husband about this because he is constantly defending his sister 🙁 That makes it hard on you I’m sure, but it sounds like they are super-close and something you’ll just have to deal with. We all wish we were on a private island with only our men. I feel like that myself and we don’t even have roommates lol. Good luck!

Post # 5
1740 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

im so sorry your going through this! my advice will be move… runnnn, the fast as you can out of there. talk to your husband… thats what i would do. but i cant think of any other solution, sorry.

i wish you luck!

Post # 6
3539 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

you know what.. I would just actually move her stuff out there and say you got in cleaning mode..

Thats what I do! I go oh im sorry I was just cleaning up and making it more practical!

Post # 9
1638 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

Wow you are a much better woman than I. If I was in this situation I would have moved all of her stuff out when I moved in. You are a married couple and deserve at least your own bedroom without his mom or sisters stuff. I think it’s great that he is so close to his family, however you are his wife which means he has to think of you too and honestly it sounds like he is being a little unreasonable about not even entertaining the idea of moving. I am assuming you would have his mom continue to live with you if you moved, but his sister seriously is 27 years old, I think it’s time he realized she’s a grown woman and he needs to let go a little bit, otherwise I think it might hurt your relationship in the long run.

Good luck with everything!

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