- 5 years ago
i cannot stand my SIL, (Husband’s brother’s new wife) I think my main issue with her is that she was clearly and obviously desperate to be married, her siblings are married with kids and she wanted to be at that point too. this is fine, i get it. She met BIL online and told him on their first date that if she wasn’t engaged in less than 2 years she would leave him. Still fine, she doesn’t want to play games, i get it. However when you pick a man with kids, you get the WHOLE package. BIL has two kids (5 and 6) half the time from a prior marriage (it ended bc he was cheated ON and he met SIL a few months after, REBOUND!) and SIL treats these kids poorly, very fake in front of familiy and even my Mother-In-Law has mentioned worry over how they will be treated worse when SIL has her own kids with BIL. (SIL wants them yesterday) She treats Mother-In-Law and Father-In-Law poorly too, she acts like she has to tolerate them, and they are nice people! it kills me.
I hate any family event where we have to see them and watch this train wreck, i dread it! (she is where the evil stepmother stereotype comes from) on top of it she is a very selfish person with low self esteem so we are constantly listening to her putting herself down so that everyone will tell her how great she is. Its sad, and to make it worse, she makes nasty/snide comments to me and I stuggle with not retaliating for the sake of the family. (Example: before either of us was engaged, she told BIL, in front of me and my husband that the most important thing about her future ERing was that it was bigger than mine. they got engaged first, at which point she shows off her ring to us, then snarkily asks “when are you getting one?”, i would never say this to anyone, and had it been said to her she would have burst into tears and made a scene.) Husband agrees with me, but wants to see the kids and his brother so tolerates the SIL. Not sure how to handle her, because if i engage, its scorched earth, not that i ever see having a friendly relationship with her anyway. suggestions? I also feel like i am slightly obsessed with this issue, i believe bc everything else is going so smoothly that this is my only source of drama i fixate on it. how do i not do this?
lastly, i need to be snarky, she had tan lines and a trashy poorly covered tattoo showing in her wedding dress. I didn’t say anything about it, but heard her commenting AT my wedding about how my large chest looked trashy in my dress. FYI it did not, (I have DDs, shes an A, poorly concealed jealousy) but who talks trash about the bride at a wedding? hate her.