(Closed) Silbing Weddings in the same year

posted 9 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
7082 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2009

As a 38 year old bride as well, I feel like at our age it’s totally reasonable to want to get married sooner rather than later… even if that means several weddings in the same year.

Are they going to have to travel long distance for all of these weddings?  Do they come from a culture where it’s really inauspicious for 2 siblings to get married in the same year?  (My poor friend had to wait nearly 2 years to get married because his brother popped the question to his Fiance first!)

If the answer to these questions is “no”, then I’d say that you need to enlist your fiance to run interference with his family and make it clear that this is what you both mutually want and plan to do!

Most of all I wanted to welcome you to Weddingbee and say Congratulations!  Don’t let anyone rain on the parade!

Post # 5
4385 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

(((hugs))) i’m sorry his family is being so difficult!! based on what you’ve said about his family being local, i’d say go for it and plan your 2010 wedding. you shouldn’t have to wait!!!!!!

Post # 7
6597 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2010

No you are DEFINITELY NOT being selfish!

I agree with you 100% each couple gets a DAY not a month, not a season and most definitely NOT a year!

I say close your ears to the drama and plan your wedding they will get over it eventually!

Post # 8
1246 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

My fiances twin brother is getting married about 7 weeks after us….its gonna such for Out of Town guests, but whatever….it happens.

Post # 9
5498 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

Since your parents are paying for it, I say do it. His parents don’t have to worry about financing your wedding, so I wouldn’t worry about it. It’s their choice not to nail down a date, so if you know when you want to get married, announce it.

Post # 11
5993 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

i dont think youre being selfish… i wouldnt put my wedding on hold for anyone and its not as if youre having it in the same month as the others…. there are weeks and weeks in between. i seriously dont get people sometimes – plan and enjoy is my vote.. and be happy 🙂


Post # 12
6661 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

We intentionally made our date 6 months after my sisters so people wouldn’t get upset about too many weddings in one year. But, her date was set. Before we got engaged. So we felt comfortable doing it. I’d say don’t let it stop you – if they’re going to be jerks there’s nothing you can do to change it, but you can still marry your FH within a decent timeframe!

Post # 13
2434 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2008

I don’t think there’s anything wrong with your plan.  It is considerate to pick a date in between the 2 other weddings. 

When my parents were married they had 5 family weddings (2 siblings and 1 cousin) all in the same year.  They staggered them all 2 months apart so that one couple could be back from their honeymoon before the wedding shower of the next.

As has been said on here before- you get your special DAY, not your special MONTH/YEAR/SEASON.

Hopefully your FIs family will settle down.  Just do your best to attend all the other events for the other couples to avoid any I told you so’s about them being close together.

Post # 14
87 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

Wow — I’m so sorry for this drama. I’m also 38 and never imagined ‘family politics’ coming into my wedding date choice. My fiance and I set our date for the end of October (next month), about 10 months out. Then my brother got engaged about 4 months ago and picked a date a week before ours. We couldn’t be happier! I can’t imagine anyone telling him how dare you pick the week before your sisters wedding. It sounds so absurd… Our families are so happy. 

Post # 15
298 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Gosh, what an overreaction from your FI’s family.

I’m in a (sort of) similar situation Future Sister-In-Law has been engaged for a couple of years and their wedding is set for July 2010. I think she was a bit worried when we got engaged that we’d have ours before hers, but we’re both fine with hers in July and ours in October.  There are a couple of overseas guests who won’t be able to make both weddings, but like you we REALLY didn’t want to wait til 2011.

I do get the feeling FI’s parents aren’t as interested in our wedding as a result — because she’s been planning hers longer and she’s local to them, while we’re 5 hours away. But it means less drama, so I’m ok with that!

Good luck — I hope the drama dies down!

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