(Closed) Silly fights – question

posted 8 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Hostess
18641 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

My husband gets whiney about it too, especially if I won’t let him open my stuff later.

Post # 4
Member
382 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

to be fair, if it’s addressed to him, it’s *his* mail. now, is it worth fighting over? probably not, but perhaps next time keep his wishes in mind and let him open his own mail unless he tells you otherwise. i know i look forward to opening mail & packages addressed to me (unless they’re bills ..boo!).

Post # 5
Member
1194 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I once dated a guy who was very suffocating and would read my email, instant messages . . . basically anything to get information about what I was doing (which was nothing).  So, I am very sensitive about my personal messages. 

My fiance and I had a conversation about it early in our relationship . . . well, maybe argued because I approached it by saying don’t read my mail ever and you’ll never have my passwords to anything and we’ll never share personal stuff like that.  But, there was a reason and we’re both very respectful to that.  We never open/read mail, check the other’s text messages or go into each other’s emails unless the other asks or give permission.

So, your fiance probably has a reason as to why he’s protective over that piece of his privacy.  Try to repect that!  It’s just not something worth fighting over.

Post # 6
Member
2562 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I never open any mail unless it is addressed to me – to me opening someone else’s mail is kind of snoopy – so I would be pretty mad if FH opened mine. He wouldn’t mind if I opened his – but I never would because it is a privacy issue to me.

Post # 7
Member
1020 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

i agree with the previous responses..neither of us have anything to hide, but i would be bothered if he just opened my mail and packages. it’s addressed to me, not you–let me open it! if you know it has something to do with you (like we have a joint account, but statements come only in my name) fine, but everything else–leave it be.

Post # 8
Member
382 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

one other thing i forgot — while most couples probably don’t think about this, my fiance & i were having a conversation about opening his mail while he is deployed overseas for 6 months. many military couples have to request power of attorney in regards to opening mail (especially if it’s anything financial or government agency related), otherwise, it is technically illegal. i’m not implying your fiance would press charges or anything like that over opening his package, but just to put in another perspective how serious the government & other people take the privacy of their mail.

gosh, i sound like a debbie downer …

Post # 9
Member
120 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

I don’t get upset over snail mails – in fact, if someone, anyone, would do me a favor and recycle them all for me without me having to look at them, I would be eternally grateful.

But I do get a little disappointed if a present/package comes for me and it has already been open. I love opening presents (don’ we all? :-)), so my husband knows to always leave the boxes and packages for me. Now he even saves his packages so I can open them, because I have so much fun doing it. 

Post # 10
Member
11325 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2011

haha nope because I would not do that! My parents have been very happily married for 34 years and they do NOT open each others mail. Its just like a rule or something? haha. I dunno I guess I wouldn’t be mad if Fiance opened my mail but its for me, so why would he?

Post # 12
Member
1237 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

Nah, we read each other’s mail, email, texts, everything. I know it’s kinda weird.. we just do!

Post # 13
Member
1103 posts
Bumble bee

We never open each other’s mail, for us it’s about respect and treating each other like adults. I would only open it if he was away (and even then, only if it looked like a bill or something important). Just because we’re married doesn’t mean we’re not entitled to a certain level of privacy (I do not need him to see how much I spend on shoes Laughing)

Post # 14
Member
2404 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

we both have opened each others mail before but we def don’t make it a habit. We both like and respect our privacy. (same goes with all of it – snail mail, email, text messages, phone conversations, etc.)

whatever both people feel comfortable with is cool i think. 

Post # 15
Member
4024 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I always open the mail. He never remembers to pick it up, so I do and open it on my way home. He doesn’t care, and if for some reason he does get the mail, he will open it all and I don’t care either! We are both going to see it anyways.

Post # 16
Member
2703 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

Fiance actually has opened up my snail mail and it irritates me and then i get over it. i haven’t opened any of his snail mail yet. it’s just an adjustment period 😛

The topic ‘Silly fights – question’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors