Post # 1

Member
223 posts
Helper bee
So, my fiancé is a sleep-talker of epic proportions. Despite how he tends to wake me up with his ramblings, I forgive him because the things he says are just so funny!
Last night, he pulled me in close for a hug and said “I like toilets”.
But, the greatest of all time was when he said “Bart…the cat who farts”, and then rolled over and farted.
What are some funny ‘sleep utterings’ of your beloved?
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This topic was modified 5 years, 3 months ago by
mrshesstobe.
Post # 2

Member
1284 posts
Bumble bee
I have conversatons with my Fiance because he sleeps talk/walk. My all time favorite was when he was scratching the wall with his toes so I asked him what he was doing and he said “I need to get to the other world”… I think he was dreaming he was in a video game.
Post # 3

Member
2317 posts
Buzzing bee
Hahaha my DH sleep talks alot. One time he was all panicked and kept saying “omg the soup we need to finish the soup” until I soothed him back to sleep (We had not had any soup for months at this time FYI).
Usually he’ll just mumble a strange sentence and when I say, what honey? He’ll smile to himself and go back to sleep. So cute.
Post # 4

Member
138 posts
Blushing bee
Ha-ha these are funny! Not quite the same thing but apparently I laugh in my sleep sometimes and my SO will ask what so funny, which usually wakes me up, not knowing I was laughing. This happened last night actually and apparently I remembered part of the dream that made me laugh and it had something to do with Nigel Thornberry. xD
Post # 5

Member
1936 posts
Buzzing bee
- Wedding: May 2018 - City, State
Omg one time Fiance said the little girl is here laughing in the middle of the night. I was like WHAT?! I was super freaked out as we live alone, no kids.
Post # 6

Member
1996 posts
Buzzing bee
oh god! once he was sick and on cold medicine, he woke straight up, said “omg look at that guy in the corner!” and I said “what??” waking right up, and he said “the one with all the make up on his face!!” Nothing like waking up to the idea that a clown man is in your bedroom likley there to murder you!
Post # 7

Member
1996 posts
Buzzing bee
Also. One time he woke up choking. he had thrown up in his sleep. lol that was like a pig squeeling and choking and whaling noise.
Post # 8

Member
1996 posts
Buzzing bee
loonylunalovegood: my older brother is a sleep walker. he would go into the living room and watch the snow/static on the tv, and laugh, but when hes sleep walking, his laugh is like…inside out. Try laughing while inhaling!! ITS SCARY!
Post # 9

Member
1162 posts
Bumble bee
He had a dream that I slept with a guy he knew since high school, that I’ve never met, and he said “So stop that.”
Post # 10

Member
3419 posts
Sugar bee
It wasn’t something he said but something he did – he lightly spanked (more like a pat) my butt a bunch of times really fast then stopped and rolled over away from me. I basically woke up to him patting my butt cheek in rapid succession.
Post # 11

Member
2303 posts
Buzzing bee
- Wedding: October 2015 - Ruby Princess
I’m the sleep talker in our relationship. Fiance texts me the shit I say so he doesn’t forget. The last time I was talking about a “tourist seat” (whatever that is), and the “chef is making a wallet”, and “Tilly has an un-chocolate house” (Tilly is the dog). Apparently he keeps asking me questions and I answer. He also claims I laugh a lot in my sleep.
Post # 12

Member
683 posts
Busy bee
mrshesstobe: haha. That would be fun, he says funny stuff! I am the sleep talker/walker in my household. DH usually tries to egg me on and get me to talk more till i start waking up and get mad because I am trying to defend the crazy things I say. Then i usually just roll over and we laugh the next morning.
First, he woke up to me pulling the covers off the bed because I had to return them to the store. They were not new covers at all..
The other day I went down the stairs to do something(i have no idea what) and woke up at the bottom of the stairs. I sleep naked, so I was naked infront of our windows so I ran back up stairs.lol
I have a lot of talking/sitting up dreams about bugs in the bed. He usually wakes up to me inspecting the bed with my flash light on my phone yelling and sometimes crying..then once he wakes me up and realise i was dreaming I can go back to sleep and Im good for the night.
I sleep talk/walk when I am stressed or have a lot going on with my job or things in life.
Post # 13

Member
4065 posts
Honey bee
I don’t remember specifics because he mostly just mumbles incoherent words that don’t make sense. One time he scared the hell out of me though. He had been asleep for about 30 minutes and I was having trouble falling asleep so I was awake and he suddenly propped up on one elbow and reached his other arm across my body like he was reaching towards the window. I even asked him what he was doing but he didn’t answer and just stayed that way for about 10 seconds and then just laid back down and fell back asleep. I didn’t know what the heck was going on. I told him about in the next morning and he thought it was the funniest thing. Not so funny at the time buddy.
Post # 14

Member
575 posts
Busy bee
My husband doesn’t do this anymore, but when we first started dating he would talk in his sleep a lot. One night I had an entire conversation with him, he was insisting he was late for gymnastics practice. Ooook then. My other favorites:
“You’re such a liar Gary” -we don’t know anyone named Gary.
“I just love you, steamy hot volcano.”
“Uh oh” *whimpers softly* “I pooed myself.” He didn’t, thank goodness.
Post # 15

Member
1022 posts
Bumble bee
One night, in a very distraught voice, my fiance and I had the following exchange:
Fiance: I’m late for my class!
Me: What class?
Fiance: I need to get to my class! I’m so late!
Me: What class
Fiance (in a tone that suggests I’m silly for not knowing): Um (duh)… my yogurt making class!
He doesn’t eat yogurt.