(Closed) Since when is there a time limit on engagements???? vent!!!!

posted 10 years ago in Emotional
Post # 17
Member
18 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2012

people get upset about ppl getting engaged and waiting a long time after becuase people have engagement parties and people buy gifts and then they end up never getting married or seperating. and some people use engagement parties as a way of getting gifts and money.

if you didnt have an engagement party then no one shud say anything.

Post # 18
Member
1344 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

@aussie_norway: Wait what?? I am having a 2 year engagement and we had an engagement party. That makes it okay for people to comment on my long engagement? Oh and for the record we are still getting married…

Honestly you’re damned if you do, damned if you don’t. Tell someone you’re having a 5 month engagement and they will flip out telling you it’s not enough time, why are you rushing bla bla bla. Have a long engagement and people ask you what you’re waiting for and why bother being engaged. Can’t win!!

Post # 19
Member
210 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

Why do people have to judge at all?  Just because one person gets engaged and plans their wedding right away and another couple for WHATEVER reason choses that this is not right for them, who has the right or a good enough reason to say “you didn’t do your engagement right”.  Why, because we didn’t do it like you?  I chose to have a short engagement (6 months) I had a friend who had a 3 month engagment.  I have another friend who already has been engaged 6 months and has not set a date yet.  My big question is who cares. It is not my life, doesn’t effect me in any way shape or form.  Like my Dad used to say about things like this – This is why ice cream comes in more than one flavor!!

@misschickpea:  We are pactically wedding twins!!!  10 days apart and same city!  Congratulations!!

Post # 20
Member
1187 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I agree with OP. You should have however long an egagement you & Fiance want, it’s your life, your decison! Just because some people don’t like stretching out the planning over an extended period of time doesn’t mean it would be like that for everyone. Fiance & I have been engaged 7 months. He said he’s ready & will get married whenever I want. We have the money and are established in our home and jobs. I have not done any wedding planning. I’m in no hurry. Fiance and I are living like we’re married and have been for a few years now and I’m not in any hurry. When the time comes we will jump on the planning bandwagon,  but until then I don’t expect anyone to judge our engagement of think we’re any less in love just because I have other things I want to do in my off time than plan a wedding right now, I’m just not a planner.

Post # 21
Member
2515 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

First off, Hello date twin! =)

We had an 18 month engagement and received the same looks/comments/questions when we’d say December 2011, no not this December…next year…

Post # 22
Member
1334 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

I have a friend who ended up dating another friend of mine.  Both are older and have been married before.  Well, her new boyfriend told her right off the bat that he was never going to marry again.  Period.  She would not accept that and one day she called me to tell me that they had come to a compromise:  If they were still dating by the end of this year, then they would get engaged and never get married (it was entirely her idea).

Now, that is just plain kooky!  She really did go off her rocker (they broke up not long after) which is another story.  But I could not figure out what the point was.  Can you imagine an infinite engagement? I don’t know what she was going to tell people when twenty years passed with no wedding plans. lol

Two years is a totally acceptable time period to be engaged-I don’t understand the negative comments at all.

Post # 23
Member
18 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2012

@TinyTina:

i dont agree on it, im just saying what i have heard from other people.

Post # 24
Member
734 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@agirlwithdreams7: I have had that issue…. We got engaged Christmas 2010 and we are not getting married until October 2012 because there is so much going on in 2011 for us (Other family weddings, family reunion, etc..) that we wanted to save money and do it right ( Nice wedding and have everything paid in full).

I have been telling people unless you want to pay for a wedding you should go ahead and want the 407 days until we are gonna do it… That usually silences them….LOL

GOOD LUCK AND GOOD FOR YOU

 

Post # 25
Member
734 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

And I hate to say it this way… But is ALWAYS the single people who have all the questions or concerns on when I am going to get married…. worry about your life.

 

Post # 26
Member
1344 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

@aussie_norway: Weird… I have never heard of that before! Can’t believe you’ve heard people say that before… I think that’s totally rude!

Post # 27
Member
2288 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

Our engagement was almost two years, and at times, it dragged. Also, I totally get what you’re saying–we had people doubting if we’d actually “go through with it” (and one relative said it to my face!). Pretty damn rude, but people just love to judge.

Post # 29
Member
1713 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

One of my Aunts asked

“Since your not getting married for quite a while, is this more of a “Promise Ring”?” 

I wanted to scream!

Engaged July 2010, Marrying December 2011.

Post # 31
Member
650 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

i got engaged in august 2009 and don’t get married until dec 2012, i had a borrowed ring (my mums) like you fi, mine just want to propose with the understanding someday we would marry when we could afford. 

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