(Closed) Single Envelope Wedding Invitations

posted 12 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
3579 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I am addressing the outer envelope the same way a two envelope bride would label the outer envelope.

And then I am having a tag tied with a ribbon around the actual invitation that will show who is invited with first names. For example (John & Jane or John & Guest)

Post # 4
1568 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

I just included on the envelope who is invited.  For example:

Mr. & Mrs. John Doe & Family

Mr. & Mrs. John Doe

Ms. Jane Doe & Guest

Post # 5
46 posts
  • Wedding: August 2010

I am doing the same- we have pocketfold invitations and one outer envelope. On the outer I am writing:

Mr. and Mrs. Invited Guest


Post # 6
300 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

We’re forgoing the inner envelope as well.  I’m addressing the outer envelope to the people who are invited, even if the person’s date doesn’t live there.

Maybe it isn’t “correct,” but I think it’s at least clear.  And those who have dates who don’t live with them tend to be my friends, who aren’t going to see it as a breach of etiquette anyway.

Post # 7
30 posts
  • Wedding: March 2010

I did the same and did mine exactly like Candy Nee

Post # 8
1013 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

What a timely post!  I’m also trying to figure this out right now, since we’re definitely NOT doing inner envelopes.  I really like Future Mrs. Martin’s solution, since I already wanted to do some sort of ribbon or string belly band with a tag attached.  I didn’t know what I wanted to put on the tag — originally was thinking of a monogram w/ our initials — but now I know exactly what I’ll write on the tag — the names of the guests who are invited!  🙂

Post # 9
86 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I am still trying to decide how to address ours. I really like the idea of using our guests first and last names. There are only a few guests I do not know personally, and we have a laid back vibe anyway. Then again, we aren’t doing inner envelopes, so I don’t want people to be offended. We’re just casual people. I never knew addressing envelopes could be such a major wedding decision 🙁

Post # 11
84 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

We did our intitations without an inner envelope.

For a single guest I addressed:

Mr. Nathan Jones


For a coupled guest:

Nathan Jones & Suzy Smith


For a gutest with guest:

Mr. Nathan Jines & Guest


I will say this created a little confusion with some single guests assuming that they were invited to come with a guest. There were some awkward conversations there, but everyone was understanding.

Post # 12
266 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

We’re not having an inner envelope either and will probably address them the same way that libra suggested.  To avoid the confusion for the single guests who aren’t invited to come with a guest we put on the RSVP card ‘We have reserved one seat in your honor’

Post # 13
279 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

My calligrapher just wrote me back today with THIS ’cause I asked the SAME thing and she had only given me instructions for outer and inner envelopes and I’m only have outers too:

“Anyway, to adjust the list for outers only you would simply put all information on the outer envelope.  The only thing that would change would be anyone invited with a guest, or anyone invited with their children.  Now you would put the ‘and Guest ‘ on the outer envelope (where with inners also, the guest would only appear on the inner) and the children would be listed on the line below their parents (or if there are a few children, you could also go with ‘and Family’…  All the other ‘rules’ of etiquette on the list would still apply – and keep in mind those are just guidelines.”     Here’s her LIST for anybody’s who’s interested! Not mine; the calligrapher’s! Happy reading, for those of you into this:

Invitation Addressing Etiquette
Review the following rules of etiquette on addressing your envelopes. Keep in mind that these are formal guidelines. Many brides are less formal in their approach to addressing. For example, they use first names on the inner envelopes (Ex: John and Mary). You should enter your guest’s names the way you feel most comfortable. Also, if possible, Word documents are much easier to work from than Excel – much easier on the eyes, and it helps me visualize the centering to see the lines stacked one above the other.  If you already have your lists in Excel don’t go crazy trying to switch them over though – I can work from that as well. 
Outer Envelopes
Use full names, including the first names.
Example:   Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Jackson
Do not write “and Family” if children are to be included on the invitation. Write their first names on the inner envelope beneath their parents’ names. (See “Inner Envelopes” below)
Write out the words “Street,” “Boulevard,” “Avenue,” “Road,” etc.
Do not use symbols. Spell out the word “and”.
Spell out state names.
Inner Envelopes
Exclude the first names of the guests
Example:    Mr. and Mrs. Jackson
Write the first names of children to be invited below the parent’s names in age order.
Example:    Mr. and Mrs. Jackson    Susie, Jane and Thomas
Children over the age of 18 should receive their own invitation.
Omit names of children if you are planning an adult-only celebration.
If an invitation to a single guest extends to an unknown escort, address the inner envelope with your friend’s name followed by “and Guest”.
Example:    Miss Jones and Guest
 Single Guests
Unmarried Female
Miss Jane JonesorMs. Jane Jones
Miss Jonesand GuestorMs. Jonesand Guest
Divorced Female-kept married name (Smith)
Mrs. Jane SmithorMs. Jane Smith
Mrs. Smithand GuestorMs. Smithand Guest
Divorced Female-back to married name (Jones)
Ms. Jane Jones
Ms. Jonesand Guest
Widowed Female
Mrs. Jane SmithorMrs. John Smith
Mrs. Smith(and Guest)

*never use ‘and guest’ if recently widowed.
Children under 18
*Do not put on outer envelope
Only list parents.
And Kayla (1 child)Kayla and Johnny (2+children)*List by age-oldest first.
Child 18 and over
Miss Kayla Jones
Miss Jonesand Guest
Unmarried couples who do not live together
Miss Jane Jones
*the only name on the outer should be the person who lives at the address.
Miss JonesMr. Davis

Unmarried couples who live together
Miss Jane JonesMr. Carl Davis
Miss JonesMr. Davis
Married couples-*notice the use of ‘and’ to signify marriage in the following:
Mr. and Mrs. Carl Davis
Mr. and Mrs. Davis
Married Couple-She kept maiden name
Mrs. Jane Jonesand Mr. Carl Davis
Mrs. Jones and Mr. Davis
Married Couple-She has hyphenated last name
Mrs. Jane Jones-Davisand Mr. Carl Davis
Mrs. Jones-Davis and Mr. Davis
Married Couple-She has a professional title and he does not.
Doctor Jane Davisand Mr. Carl Davis
Doctor Davisand Mr. Davis
Married Couple-both are doctors
Doctor Jane Davis and Doctor Carl Davis
The Doctors Davis
The Doctors Davis
Married Couple-both are doctors with different last names

Doctor Jane Jonesand Doctor Carl Davis
Doctor JonesandDoctor Davis
Same sex Couples-list in alphabetical order by last name
Mr. Fred SmithMr. Mark Jones
Mr. SmithandMr. Jones
He is a commissioned officer
Colonel and Mrs. Carl Davis
Colonel and Mrs. Davis
He is a non-commissioned officer or enlisted man
Mr. And Mrs. Carl Davis
Mr. and Mrs. Davis
He is a retired commissioned officer
Colonel and Mrs. Carl Davis
Mr. and Mrs. Davis
She is a commissioned officer, he is not
Mr. and Mrs. Carl DavisorCaptain Jane Davisand Mr. Carl Davis
Mr. and Mrs. DavisorCaptain Davis and Mr. Davis
The Honorable and Mrs. Carl Davis
Judge and Mrs. Davis
Reverend and Mrs. Carl Davis
Reverend and Mrs. Davis


Post # 14
99 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

These tags-tied-with-ribbon sound so cute… do any of you have pics of what this would look like? Where the tags go, how they’re attached, etc? I tried googling but haven’t found much yet.

Post # 15
16 posts
  • Wedding: October 2010

Wow, what a great post…THANK YOU!  I have been a little stressed about the invites too..

We are having a pretty casual wedding but I also have this inner beast that always wants to do things ‘right’…

I have been having an inner battle with regards to my brother…he has been seeing someone for almost a year now and when I am married it will be well over a year…they do not live together.  Etiquette says to address it “Brother Insurance Girl & Guest”……But I am afraid that his SO will be offended….

My Maid/Matron of Honor hit it right on the head:  Do you want your brother & SO ticked off at the wedding and in a bad way?  Or do you want a nice day where everyone is happy happy?

I know the obvious answer to that question, so this one invite will be ‘wrong’ for the sake of peace and happiness in my family…

Post # 16
1259 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

Ugh! I dont think I will be having inner envelopes but honestly people get offended over these things!?! Seems so trivial in life in my opinion!

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