Singles not given a plus one

posted 2 months ago in Etiquette
Post # 16
Member
641 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2019

I’d personally give her a plus one because I would never go to a wedding by myself.  And because I’ve always been invited with a plus one when I’ve been single and very much appreciated it. 

Post # 17
Member
85 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2020 - Florida

I think that +1 for sjngld guests is nice but not necessarily needed. If someone knows no one else they are just less likely to come. Do what works for your budget!

Post # 18
Member
1347 posts
Bumble bee

I would have given a +1 to any guest who didn’t know anyone else well at the wedding. 

Post # 19
Member
1037 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

Hmm I think given she might not know anyone I would give her a plus one to be nice. I totally get not bothering if they are part of a bigger group ie friends, cousins or workmates who will know others attending but it might be a bit lonely if everyone else goes a bit ‘cliquey’ on the dance floor. Plus she might not even end up bringing someone if she’s single even if she does get a plus one but you will know you at least offered so that would be a win-win. 

Post # 20
Member
4019 posts
Honey bee

I gave everyone a plus one so they would be comfortable and have fun. There weren’t a lot of truly single people on my guest list, but those that were either brought new relationships, a friend, and one even brought their sibling. Weddings are expensive to attend, and often a pain requiring some travel or hotel accomodations. I think the best thing to do as a host is to give everyone a plus one. Etiquette wise, you’re not a jerk if you don’t, but I think its the right thing to do just on a people to people level.

Post # 21
Hostess
2389 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

If I invited someone who wasn’t likely to know many people and they were single I gave them a plus one because I could. Most of the singles didn’t use them but a few people did so it was nice to know they had the option.

Post # 22
Member
367 posts
Helper bee

it’s not required, but i think in this situation it would be nice to offer, especially if the other couple she knows isn’t able to attend. 

fwiw, we gave “plus ones” to 20ish single friends to our wedding (legitimately single– not even a bf or gf) and only one person brought someone.  i think the worry about the wedding being filled with “randoms” is extreme.

i know this isn’t “proper etiquette” or whatever, but you could also potentially verbally tell her its fine to bring a plus one after you see if you get declines.

Post # 23
Member
883 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2020

We’re inviting any known partners but not adding plus ones for truly single people, because the single people in our case are all cousins or members of our longtime joint friend group.

If any of our coworkers were single, we would have offered them plus ones since they wouldn’t know as many people there.

In OP’s case, I would offer the single friend a plus one since she really only knows CC, who may or may not be attending.

Post # 24
Member
12801 posts
Honey Beekeeper

Again, if you can manage it, it’s a generous gesture, but that’s not always possible. However, unlike inviting close family member children only, I think it should be on an all or nothing basis. I’m not a fan of inviting some single friends with a date and not others as some have suggested here. 

I wish people with a number of single friends would use this as an opporunity to introduce them to one another. There was a time when no crutch was needed and weddings were a great place to meet people. 

But if it’s one single friend and they know no one, I’d make the effort to give them that option. 

Post # 25
Member
41 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2020

View original reply
Mlim :  Nope! No +1. Only required if they’re married, engaged, or living together in my opinion.

Post # 26
Member
672 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2020

I wouldn’t give her a plus one unless she’s in a committed relationship.

Post # 27
Member
1258 posts
Bumble bee

My first wedding we gave everyone a plus one. We had one questionable guest. Her butt cheeks and black thong were all over the video. Everyone talked about her for many months following the wedding. 

This time, I only included plus ones, if they had a special someone and I invited that person by name. even if they didn’t technically live together but have been dating and in an established relationship. No one has asked about bringing a plus one and the singles are coming. They will have family and friends in attendance 

Post # 28
Member
688 posts
Busy bee

We gave anyone in a serious relationship (i.e., been dating a year or so, living together, engaged…) a plus one.  Any super close single friends i gave a plus one.  And anyone who doesnt know many people there (like 5+ people) got a plus one.

 

But anyone who was single and part of a friend group invited, didnt get a plus one

 

Post # 29
Member
4961 posts
Honey bee

For my daughter’s wedding we gave +1 to all her friends who had to travel long distance. Her sorority sisters were scattered around the country and there were a few who took the option. One guest brought her sister. I understand that for some people it’s not a lot of fun to travel alone. 

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