Post # 1
Okay, I need some advice. To start this off, my sister and I have never really gotten along. She is extremely controlling and likes to be the center of attention at all points in time. However, she had my other sister and me as joint MOHs, and my other sister did the same with us. Thus, I have decided to make both of my sisters MOHs. She can also be great for short intervals at time, and when I asked her, she was in one of those “good” moments, so I figured everything would be okay. Boy, was I wrong.
My sister’s husband is from a very rich family, and she spends money like it grows on trees. His brother was recently married and they dropped thousands of dollars on travel, food, drinks, etc. on his destination wedding. Money was not an object. She buys lattes before work each morning, goes out all the time, and constantly eats out. I’m not criticizing her, but she obviously has money.
Now that it comes to my wedding, she claims she cannot afford the $150 bridesmaid dress that I have picked out for them. She has hated every dress I have shown her up until this point; my other maids have suggested not even asking her for her opinion anymore because she hates everything. They are all extremely happy with the style and price of the dress I have chosen. They shouldn’t even need to pay for alterations because I chose a very casual dress as our wedding is not going to be extremely formal.
I asked the girls to purchase it within the next month if they can because the dresses are from Anthropologie and are not restocked like wedding stores. My sister now claims she won’t have the money for “several weeks to months” and she “hopes they will even still carry it” by the time she can afford it. She also complained that she is heavy and the dress only goes up to a size 14. Well, the last time I checked, she wore a 10 or 12 and multiple reviews on the website say the dress runs big.
What do I do if she keeps being uncooperative? I am hardly a bridezilla, but I feel like anything I pick will be unsatisfactory for her and she will constantly complain.
Post # 3
I’d probably leave it alone. You told her what she needs to do. Now she needs to do it. I’d probably ask my other sister to speak to her. If she doesn’t get the dress after that, that’s when you’ll need to figure out what to do. Sorry she’s being so difficult, I hope she becomes more cooperative soon!
Post # 4
Your sister needs to get over herself..and I say this with compassion. She needs to stop acting like a child and realize that it’s not about her. This wedding is about you and your fiance. Honestly, if she’s having this much of a problem over the dress and stuff, I’d tell her straight forward that if she continues to behave this way, that you would seriously take her out of the bridal party. This isn’t a threat, it’s just a stern statement saying what you expect from her as your Maid/Matron of Honor. If she can’t handle it, than maybe she shouldn’t be up there.
Post # 5
Thank you for the advice. I called Anthropologie to see how long this style is going to be carried, and of course my luck is that they only have five dresses left in her size, but they are fully stocked in every other size! The dress is being discontinued, so that’s it once they are sold out!
I e-mailed her nicely with these details and even offered to put it on my credit card until she could pay for it, and she got pisseddddd. She then proceeded to tell me she and her husband would figure it out sometime soon, although I don’t know what she needs to figure out since she has the money- lol.
She is going on vacation for a week (hmm… funny how she can afford that! lol) where she said she will not able to be reached by cell phone or e-mail, so I asked her if I could just charge it to be on the safe side instead of her waiting until she gets back. She told me she is stressed and she can’t handle it, so she will buy it later today and contact me when she orders it. That was about two hours ago.
To put things into perspective, this dress is $150 and the only thing I am asking them to pay for with the wedding. The ball is in her court… we’ll see what happens!!
Post # 6
What ended up happening with this?
My sister is driving me crazy, too.. it’s nice to hear that im not the only one.
Post # 7
It ended hilariously, actually. My sister waited two days to order the dress. As my luck would go, Anthropologie sent her an email after she placed her order telling her that they were sorry, but they were out of stock on the dress in her size only and would not be restocking because the dress was being discontinued. This was after the other bridesmaids had purchased their dresses.
She called me and told me what happened and told me she would be forwarding me the email from Anthropologie so I would know she hadn’t made it up as I knew she didn’t like the dress. I told her that wasn’t necessary, but she did it anyways. She sounded so happy and told me I should go back to the drawing board and find something good for everyone. She was out with her friends so she was really showing off in how rude she was to me.
I decided to brush her off and call Anthropologie’s hotline and ask if there was any chance there was one dress in her size sitting in a store somewhere or something. The girl was so helpful and gave me the phone number to a store in Florida; I called and they happened to have had a girl return the dress in her size after purchasing it online. They offered to ship it free of charge to my sister’s doorstep!!
She was really crabby when I told her what happened, but the funny thing is that a week later she texted me and told me that her husband told her the dress looked really sexy on her and he wanted her to wear it all the time after the wedding.
Now she is acting like she never had a problem at all!! I’m just glad everything worked out in the end. I’ve learned that you can either sit and cry about your family drama, or just blow it off and focus on the fact that this is YOUR wedding. I’m sure more drama will occur, but who cares? Those people are the ones who have to deal with it, so I’m just focusing on the positive people around me. 🙂