- 6 years ago
At the risk of sounding bitchy, my younger brother met a perfect girl (the whole family was over the moon about her), got engaged 9 or 10 months later, then married 6 months after that, all while my own wedding was cancelled (I cancelled it) and engagement ended (I was dumped). My situation was a disaster.
He is my little brother! My parents are thrilled about this girl; my brother and his wife moved near my parents and live a very similar, simple, and deeply religious life to them and go and cook for them. I recently got a long and loving email from my new “sister”. I know I should grow up and just get over it, but I am jealous that they have had it so easy, that my family is so happy about this match, and that now I’m getting loving letters from someone younger than me (who I don’t think has ever suffered in her life! Really, she’s a gorgeous, scholarship-drenched, perfect person–the embodiment of everything my parents love). I’ve searched and searched and worked and worked for years and had so many “almosts!” At the wedding, her father spoke about how God took care of her and sent her this spouse (my brother). It was very difficult to hear. The two families have mixed perfectly and are best budds, and my mother is in Heaven over this girl! My mother started crying when I told her that I was getting married to my now ex-fiance. The family rejoicing over this (my older brother being “proud” of my younger brother but “disappointed” in me) has just been so painfully contrasted.
I really am aware that it is my own issues (my own choice of man that fell through and I have spoken to a counsellor about it); I shouldn’t feel sorry for myself or blame my family, which has tried to be supportive of me in many ways. I’m not denying that at all, but does anyone have any suggestions for dealing with something like this (bitterness, jealousy, pain etc?). I really feel like distancing myself from my family to get away from it, but I know that that’s not dealing with it.