Post # 1
So, I am engaged to be married to a great guy. He is nice, smart and is great at things that are important to me (couponing, cleaning) etc. We enjoy doing the same things and have a great relationship. We have a pretty regimented life; we have a routine down and stick to a schedule. A few weeks ago my sister came into town and I feel like has changed the dynamic of everything. She is totally different than me; a free-spirit. She has lived in five different states in the past 2 years, had a million jobs, flunked out of college, spent her 20s partying and dating bad-boys and now she is definitely settled down more but she still just irks me. For instance, my fiance and I invited her over to dinner and the subject of marriage came up. I asked my sister if she ever saw herself getting married and she said probably not because, for her, it isn’t necessary. I asked her to explain further and she said that there’s really no way to tell how you will feel a year from now so why on earth would you commit yourself to one person for the rest of your life when there are billions of people in the world. She said her theory is live everyday one day at a time and don’t think too far in the future because you never know what might happen. I just rolled my eyes at this, but my fiance just seemed entranced. Ever since my sister showed up he just acts obsessed. Granted, she is gorgeous and very charismatic and funny but she has always been very different. She never wanted kids, a husband….she lives for adventure and that’s not me. My fiance now just goes on and on about what an exciting life my sister has lived and she’s not even 30 yet (29). He says he wishes he could have that many stories to tell…plus I think the fact that she’s a recovering alcoholic is also appealing because she has that ‘bad-girl’ side. I’ve always been the hard-working, good-girl but I feel like there is always this competition with my sister and I hate it. I just need some advice because my fiance won’t shut up about my sister and I hate it. My sis isn’t egging him on or engaging it at all but I know shes’ aware of his fixation. I think she is just ignoring it and hoping I don’t notice. Bleh.
Post # 2
When is your sister leaving? Your fiance is entranced because perhaps he is itching for some sort of excitement in life- a life of regimented tasks and couponing is just not cutting it. She might be the wake up both of you need to realize your needs. Better now than after marriage.
Post # 3
Your sister isn’t ruining your relationship. Your fiance is an ass (assuming you aren’t making a mountain out of a molehil).
Post # 4
coupon cutting pun intended?
Post # 5
Yep! Just because OP’s sister feels differently about marriage and is vivacious, gorgeous, and free-spirited does not mean she
is “ruining” the relationship.
Post # 7
OP, it sounds like you’re jealous of your sister a bit. She has this great life of adventure and has been able to have it in spite of being generally irresponsible. That would probably make most people jealous! I don’t agree with her perspectives about not needing to plan for things, but it sounds like you (and clearly your fiance) would like to find yourselves a little more free-spirited at times. Maybe give it a try.
And, yeah, she’s not ruining your relationship at all. This isn’t her fault.
Post # 8
He is nice, smart and is great at things that are important to me (couponing, cleaning) etc.
This is one of the weirdest sentences I’ve ever read on here. Who puts couponing as one of their top compatability must haves lol
Post # 9
Or cleaning for that matter…..
lulabellegrace : You might want to rexamine this a little bit ” We have a pretty regimented life; we have a routine down and stick to a schedule” ……..you know the saying, ‘it’s not the things you do you that you regret, it the things you don’t do .
Post # 10
Your sister hasn’t done anything wrong and she absolutely is not ruining your relationship.
She clearly has a very different view on life than you but when you invite her over and ask her to share those views, you don’t then get to be upset when she answer honestly. She hasn’t said anything offensive or hurtful, she just views life differently than you and that’s okay.
Your problem is with your fiance expressing some sort of desire for your sister or with your own insecurities. Either way, I suggest you tell you fiance your concerns that he seems “entranced” by her.
Post # 11
Yeah this isn’t a sister problem. I can see where after a daily life of the same thing..the same way..day in and day out might get a little old after a while. That’s not to say daily life doesn’t get mundane after a while because it absolutely does. Most of my days look fairly similar. However, I do make it a point to plan a vacation regularly or a night out with friends so that we don’t get into a rut. You guys can have exciting stories to tell as well..you just sometimes have to look beyond the coupon cutting. Or ya know.. try Groupon getaways or something. You still get the thrill of a bargain with an adventure as well.
Post # 12
Bees, I’m getting a strong feeling of fiction from this sit-com script post.
Bee, your characters are just too on the nose. The “free spirit” who breezes in from out of town and disrupts the placid coupon-clipping couple is hackneyed, stale, and predictable.
Maybe start stretching your mind a bit by reading more challenging fiction, and watch a variety of things. It pains me to lay it on you like this, but this scenario simply won’t sell.
Post # 13
I get loving routine, I do too! But it’s important not to go overboard and to have a bit of spontaneity too. I think your fiance is realizing this. Why don’t you start planning a little adventure, like a weekend getaway? Or even a fancy date night, to give him some spontaneity and something to look forward to?
Post # 14
Sounds more like you are upset that your SO has decided that there are more exciting things in life than cleaning and couponing. He is allowed to try and like new things. Blaming your sister and trying to throw shade on her lifestyle is immature and shows your insecurity.
Post # 15
OP, if this post is real, I think you should focus on what your fiance is actually entranced by, the idea of an adventure, not so much your sister. Have you asked him if he feels like he needs that in your life and how you can support him in that? The two of you could go on a lot of adventures together and bond over that.
IDK, just imagining the sight of a man, with his strong hands holding a pair of scissors and the Sunday Ads has my heart all a flutter.