Sister ruining my relationship

posted 3 years ago in Emotional
Post # 2
Member
5890 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: January 2017

When is your sister leaving? Your fiance is entranced because perhaps he is itching for some sort of excitement in life- a life of regimented tasks and couponing is just not cutting it. She might be the wake up both of you need to realize your needs. Better now than after marriage. 

Post # 3
Member
4639 posts
Honey bee

Your sister isn’t ruining your relationship. Your fiance is an ass (assuming you aren’t making a mountain out of a molehil).

Post # 5
Member
1558 posts
Bumble bee

 

View original reply
zl27 :  Yep! Just because OP’s sister feels differently about marriage and is vivacious, gorgeous, and free-spirited does not mean she is “ruining” the relationship.

 

Post # 7
Member
1155 posts
Bumble bee

OP, it sounds like you’re jealous of your sister a bit. She has this great life of adventure and has been able to have it in spite of being generally irresponsible. That would probably make most people jealous! I don’t agree with her perspectives about not needing to plan for things, but it sounds like you (and clearly your fiance) would like to find yourselves a little more free-spirited at times. Maybe give it a try. 

And, yeah, she’s not ruining your relationship at all. This isn’t her fault. 

Post # 8
Member
7804 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

He is nice, smart and is great at things that are important to me (couponing, cleaning) etc.

This is one of the weirdest sentences I’ve ever read on here. Who puts couponing as one of their top compatability must haves lol

Post # 9
Member
10529 posts
Sugar Beekeeper

View original reply
jellybellynelly :  

Or cleaning for that matter…..

lulabellegrace :  You might want to rexamine this a little bit ” We have a pretty regimented life; we have a routine down and stick to a schedule” ……..you know the saying,  ‘it’s not the things you do you that you regret, it the things you don’t do .

 

Post # 10
Member
9439 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2016

Your sister hasn’t done anything wrong and she absolutely is not ruining your relationship.

She clearly has a very different view on life than you but when you invite her over and ask her to share those views, you don’t then get to be upset when she answer honestly. She hasn’t said anything offensive or hurtful, she just views life differently than you and that’s okay.

Your problem is with your fiance expressing some sort of desire for your sister or with your own insecurities. Either way, I suggest you tell you fiance your concerns that he seems “entranced” by her.

Post # 11
Member
3715 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

Yeah this isn’t a sister problem. I can see where after a daily life of the same thing..the same way..day in and day out might get a little old after a while. That’s not to say daily life doesn’t get mundane after a while because it absolutely does. Most of my days look fairly similar. However, I do make it a point to plan a vacation regularly or a night out with friends so that we don’t get into a rut. You guys can have exciting stories to tell as well..you just sometimes have to look beyond the coupon cutting. Or ya know.. try Groupon getaways or something. You still get the thrill of a bargain with an adventure as well.

Post # 12
Member
525 posts
Busy bee

Bees, I’m getting a strong feeling of fiction from this sit-com script post. 

Bee, your characters are just too on the nose. The “free spirit” who breezes in from out of town and disrupts the placid coupon-clipping couple is hackneyed, stale, and predictable. 

Maybe start stretching your mind a bit by reading more challenging fiction, and watch a variety of things. It pains me to lay it on you like this, but this scenario simply won’t sell. 

 

Post # 13
Member
193 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2019

I get loving routine, I do too!  But it’s important not to go overboard and to have a bit of spontaneity too. I think your fiance is realizing this. Why don’t you start planning a little adventure, like a weekend getaway?  Or even a fancy date night, to give him some spontaneity and something to look forward to?

Post # 14
Member
7535 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

Sounds more like you are upset that your SO has decided that there are more exciting things in life than cleaning and couponing. He is allowed to try and like new things. Blaming your sister and trying to throw shade on her lifestyle is immature and shows your insecurity.

Post # 15
Member
317 posts
Helper bee

OP, if this post is real, I think you should focus on what your fiance is actually entranced by, the idea of an adventure, not so much your sister. Have you asked him if he feels like he needs that in your life and how you can support him in that? The two of you could go on a lot of adventures together and bond over that. 

View original reply
jellybellynelly :  

IDK, just imagining the sight of a man, with his strong hands holding a pair of scissors and the Sunday Ads has my heart all a flutter. 

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