Sister tattooed her eyeballs. Feeling like she shouldn't be a BM…

posted 3 years ago in Family
Post # 61
9604 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2015

Youre not close, so no.

Post # 62
2343 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

mrsginger :  When I was her age I was a timber importer, at 40 I was ready for a career change and retrained as a teacher, I’m now director of a financial services company, many people don’t stay in the same career all their lives. I’m all for choice generally, I just feel she is actually restricting her own potential future choices by these radical and irreversible choices. People change. You will note that I said I probably would ask her to be bridesmaid (the only cause for doubt being if she is difficult and they aren’t close rather than the body mods), I realise we won’t agree on this. For me it’s the permanence, not the look per se. 

Post # 63
1983 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2016 - Sussex, UK

I’ve seen the eyeball tattoos because there was a series on UK TV about body modification. It personally freaks me out and I’m sure some other people feel the same would be looking at her.

The biggest thing is obviously her attitude and whether you feel close to her. It’s fine for BMs to want to express their individuality and not have to look exactly how you want them to but it doesn’t sound like she’ll go along with ANY of your ideas/ themes.

Post # 64
8266 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

spaceship54321 :  

You could google Japanese cameltoe underwear instead. Not as painful but just as ‘wtf’……

Post # 65
1813 posts
Buzzing bee

I don’t think I’d be able to relate to her enough to be comfortable having her as a Bridesmaid or Best Man based on your description of your relationship…the tattooed eyeballs and forehead branding are just symptoms of that disconnect.

Post # 66
469 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2016

nah – I dont think Id have her. 

It’s not ridiculous or bridezilla of you to want to have your wedding moment without everyone staring at her or for you to want your wedding party to look a certain way (ie without tattoos on their eyeballs/branded foreheads).

She made those choices without giving a f*** about the situation it would put you in…so I wouldn’t feel bad. 

Post # 67
564 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2018

Just stopping by to say OMG I feel sick at the thought of tattooed eyeballs. surprised

Post # 68
7372 posts
Busy Beekeeper

If this was me, my only questions are:

Do I love her and has she supported me? Then, I’d absolutey still have her as Bridesmaid or Best Man. Because, nobody is gonna give a shit about a BM’s freaking eyeballs or forehead. Like I’d notice and focus on what I’m there for the damn BRIDE.

If you aren’t close or if she’s been a problem (outside of her appearance) then no, I wouldn’t have her as Bridesmaid or Best Man anyways.

I don’t care about Bridesmaid or Best Man appearances. I care about having the people that support me sharing in this moment. 

Post # 69
7852 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

I just googled this and holy fuck. Why would anyone…eeeeep. Idk. I’m normally 10000000% against dictating your bridesmaids’ appearances but this is beyond the pale. It’s worse than those giant earrings that stretch peoples ear lobes into floppy sagging hunks of flesh (those also make me ill to look at). I would probs have to pass on this one…

Post # 70
624 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2019

For those that think the sister will be the center of attention because of her eyeballs… uhm she’ll be a guest right? Either bridesmaid OR guest–people will stare.

Honestly, the only difference between guests and bridal party are PHOTOS. As a guest, you might have a photo or two–maybe 10 if family. But as bridesmaid, she’ll be a part of many, many formal photos with the bride and groom.

I am thinking this is it. Not the attention (cause she’ll get it no matter what..)–it’s the thought that your speshul photos will be weird right?

Post # 71
119 posts
Blushing bee

I had to Google it and oh my God… I’m like you I have no issue with tattoos and/or body modification but tattooed eyeballs is a nope. That’s just too much. 

But, I wouldn’t say it was due to her choice of body modification. You said that y’all aren’t super close so just have near and dear people in your wedding party and go about it that way. 

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