(Closed) Sisters bridesmaids drama/vent….am I making the right decision? thanx4read

posted 8 years ago in Family
Post # 3
58 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

Hey, this sounds unpleasant, but also, there are lots of positives to remember.

Clearly, your sisters love you and care about you. They have concerns, which are founded in misconceptions of your relationship. You can help them help you. I would actually write them each a letter. I know it’s outdated and everything, but it really works. When things are written down, they have to actually read it all. They can’t interrupt you as they can when you are talking, they have to hear you out.

I would explain like you just did here that you and your fiance have gone through the growing pains and that you have solid financial plans together. I’d emphasize that their care and concern is received, heard, and understood. Now is the time to see that your own judgement is well founded, and that their task is to support you.

Whether you should keep them on as bridesmaids or not, I don’t know. I probably would, but I hate any kind of confrontation.

Also, enlist your dad’s help in dealing with your mom and sisters. Seems like he is an overlooked resource here 🙂

Good luck!

Post # 4
223 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

I think that your sisters have your best interests at heart. I think they just want to make sure you know what you are getting into. I personally think it’s okay to point out some “negative possibilities” as long as it’s done in a respectful way. Put it this way-I value my friends’/family’s opinions and I would want them to tell me if they had concerns. I would listen to the concerns, then make my own decision and tell them “I appreciate that you are looking out for me, and appreciate you bringing those concerns up, but ultimately, it’s my life and my decision, and marrying him is what I want”

That being said…you have a right to choose who is standing next to you the day you get married.  Do what will make you the happiest on your wedding day. 

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