(Closed) sister’s fiance’s family

posted 7 years ago in Family
  • poll: is inviting sister's future in-laws
    normal? : (7 votes)
    17 %
    a gift grab? : (34 votes)
    83 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    470 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    I think the fact that you don’t even know them makes it seem like a gift grab.  What’s your reason for wanting to invite them? I kind of did something similar -I invited my SIL’s sister & husband to my wedding because my niece and nephew are the flower girl & ring bearer and SIL’s sister has put a lot of effort into getting a dress for my niece, so I wanted her to be able to see them in action.

    Post # 5
    Member
    1927 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    The most important question here is “Are they invited to your wedding?” If the answer is no then 100% do NOT invite them to the shower, Etiquette says that every guest invited to the shower must be invited to the wedding. If they are invited to the wedding then I would discuss it with your Sister and her Fiance, ask them how FBIL’s family would feel if they were invited (if they would be excited or if they would be confused.)

    Post # 6
    Member
    7431 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2009

    Is she inviting your FI’s family to her shower and wedding? I agree, that sounds weird and gift grabby

    Post # 7
    Member
    2233 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    I think because you’ve never met them there is no reason to invite them. They are her soon to be family not yours. Is she inviting your in-laws to her bridal shower?

    FI’s sister’s in laws will all be invited to our wedding. In this case I see and spend time with all of them so I don’t find it weird.

    Post # 8
    Member
    6015 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: March 2012

    Yes if you had some sort of relationship with them, like neighbors or something, I could see inviting them.  It seems like a gift grab tho.

    Post # 10
    Member
    1269 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: January 2011

    I invited my sisters in laws to my wedding because I know them and have visited them.  I would not have otherwise.  They are still strangers to you.

    Post # 11
    Member
    470 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    @qwerty1: That’s nuts!  I’d tell her to buzz off.  She doesn’t get a say in your guest list

    Post # 13
    Member
    2233 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    @qwerty1: Can you get someone else on guest list control? preferably someone who agrees with you? You don’t want to come off as rude if she’s going to invite them to the shower but you have no intention of inviting them to the wedding.. I could see this making you obligated to invite them to the wedding then. 

    Post # 14
    Member
    1701 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    If you don’t know them, they shouldn’t be invited to anything.  I know my sister’s in-laws–seriously would recognize them on a street in a foreign country (this is how we culled the guest list).  I still didn’t invite them to anything because I haven’t seen them in over 5 years.

    Post # 15
    Member
    10568 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: January 2011

    I think inviting them to the wedding is fine.  My sister invited my Mother-In-Law & Father-In-Law (I wasn’t married at the time) and she had never met them.  I invited hers to mine.  I wouldn’t invite them to the shower though.

    Post # 16
    Member
    1145 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: December 2011

    @qwerty1: Gift grabby becuase you dont know them

    The topic ‘sister’s fiance’s family’ is closed to new replies.

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