Sitting adult couple at children (young adult's) table

posted 2 months ago in Guests
Post # 15
7936 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

It’s your wedding. Make your own seating chart the way you see fit.

I would put the offending aunt/uncle with your family and all the kids together, or seat all the children with their parents.

Personally it annoys the shit out of me when I don’t get seated with the people I came with.

Post # 16
1236 posts
Bumble bee

gullivermouse :  They don’t have “goggles” on. They know 1000% that it IS a big deal…they are doing this on purpose to humiliate the “bad” aunt/uncle. I would do TWO children’s tables… one for the actual children and one for your FI’s family who are acting like children.

Speaking of whom….what is your FI doing about this? It’s HIS family – he needs to shut this sh*t down… Everyone needs to GROW THE F* UP for ONE freaking day.


Post # 17
1345 posts
Bumble bee

I’ve been to a lot of weddings and the ones that worked out best imo had no seating chart. This isn’t kindergarten, people will sit where they please anyway.

Post # 18
20 posts

gullivermouse :  B….this is one of those instances where you’re gonna have to put your foot down.  They want things their way but this is YOUR wedding and therefore you and your FI have final say.  If you have a problem with putting adults at a kids table, then say so and make it very clear what is and what is not happening!  Make it very clear that you will not be joining in the family drama and so you will be assigning accordingly.  Sometimes adults act like children….don’t cater to them and don’t be a part of the drama.   

Post # 20
130 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2018

Don’t let ANY family members have ANY input whatsoever of the seating chart, which is hard enough to plan without bad blood between people. IMO your family can be pleasantly surprised about who’s sitting where the day of.

Post # 21
2205 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

gullivermouse :  I went to an engagements it party where the mother on the groom was fighting with her two sisters and sat them on the kids table unbeknown to the bride and groom. Totally awkward!!! I was ten or so and I still remember this!! 

Can you sit them with some  other couples, adult friends of yours or your extended family?? I think that would be a good solution and I think its pretty had that your fiancés family suggested the kiddies table….😕

Post # 22
991 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

just sit them with other guests, im sure the aunt and uncle would be a little more happy sitting with 20/30 somethings then a bunch of 10 year olds. 

that or tell your family to grow up, and make them sit together like you planned. Most people dont stay seated very long when it comes to wedding receptions anyways. 

Post # 23
430 posts
Helper bee

They are doing this on purpose to humiliate that couple. Figure out your own solution on your own, without any input from them. Go ahead with your plans, with out telling them. They have no business putting their opinions in. I’m surprised you’ve let them talk about this issue for as long as you have. You don’t need their opinions, or permissions. 

Post # 24
7274 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2015


gullivermouse :  Why can’t your aunt/uncle table (with the outcast couple) be on the same side of the room as your FILs? That way everyone can be near the kids’ table. 

Post # 25
5036 posts
Bee Keeper


gullivermouse :  

This,  that  rosydelight said 

Go ahead with your plans with out telling them. They have no business putting their opinions in. I  m surprised you ‘ve let them talk about this issue for as long as you have. You don’ t need their opinions, or permissions.

  is all the advice you need OP, don’t spend another 5 mins arguing or worrying about it.   Do not engage with any of them except to say  ‘yes, the seating chart is beign done thanks’ 

Post # 26
435 posts
Helper bee

yupmarried :  I agree. Seating charts may be fun to put together but it’s an unnecessary thing.

OP, my parents would bring me along to distant relatives’ or family friends’ weddings even when I was twenty-something years old. I’d barely know anyone and would have been mortified if I had to sit next to some strangers’ kids/teens. I would have rather made small talk with my parents. My parents would also often start conversations with people they just met from the other party’s side (sometimes those people also being distant to whichever side invited them and not really knowing anyone else).

If those weddings would have had assigned seats or even bride’s/groom’s sides, I don’t think people would have enjoyed it much.

So let people sit wherever they want with the exception of reserved tables for the wedding parties, or at least let the children (whatever age) sit with their parents.

Post # 29
12614 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

How awful would you feel if you were the only adults seated at the kids table?  That’s ridiculous, don’t do that to them.  I would be livid if I were in that situation.  I’m sure you can find another table of adults to seat them with that isn’t family. 

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